If I ever will...

I never really did have a lot of friends growing up, some here and there over the years but I don't see them anymore. I have my younger brother who is my best friend and has supported me over the years and another friend who I had but I since moved an hour away so we sometimes talk on the phone. But I wish I had a bigger connection of people I can talk to. Because sometimes my brothers working or my friend is busy working 2 jobs and going to collage. I also always felt this void feeling like I would love to meet a girl and fall in love, I don't have any confidence in my self, my damn social anxiety has really made me feel isolated from the world, I can't even take the trash out down the road around the corner to the dumpster because what happens if I run into someone outside, a simple hey how are you today? Makes my heart race,did I fumble my words? Did I speak loud enough for them to hear me? What do I say if they say hi to me? among other things I overthink about. I don't feel that confident in my appearance. I always think when on the rare occasions I do go out, that people think I'm ugly or I look pathetic. How am I gonna meet a girl if I have social anxiety, Id be to damn anxious. And I think nobody would want me. I think everybody is worthy of love but except me. Even when I think there could be a chance, later I'm like no it ain't gonna happen. I'm not trying to sound pathetic or cringe worthy. I just hate that anxiety makes me feel so damn weak and that leads to me feeling pretty sad and undeserving of anything. Sorry I feel stupid that I'm telling all this but I don't want to keep it in either. I'm just getting my feelings off my chest. Thank you to whoever read all this. This is who I am. This is how I feel.

[Missinglobe89]

You should know you're not alone. Myself and a lot, I mean a lot of people feel this way. You are not alone in this. Confidence comes and goes for me. One day I feel fine as hell, the next I feel like trash. I've been trying to remind myself, That it's none of my business what other people think of me. That's their problem and I don't have time for any more problems. Once you find a way to be comfortable with yourself people will notice and want to get to know you. The right people will find you. And the right person will understand. Keep your head up. And the people on here are great so there's always some to talk to.

[Hidden in reply to Missinglobe89]

Thank you for your response. Your right,the people on here is a blessing to me. It's hard I know everyone knows that. But all we can do is try to get better.

[Agora1 in reply to Hidden]

It will happen when the time is right and you are ready.

Meanwhile, reach out to us FaithWarrior and we will walk

this journey together. xx

[Hidden in reply to Agora1]

Yes thank you! Anybody can reach out too me to. I'll be there.

[Agora1 in reply to Hidden]

I know you will, for we are all Warriors at heart. xx

[Ml601]

Hi I know exactly how you feel when it comes to the social anxiety. I feel like im afraid of the world. I've come to hate who I am but I know most of it is in my head but its still hard. If you ever need to talk im here.

[Hidden in reply to Ml601]

Yea im always in my head not a fun place to be with overthinking. Thank you! I really do appreciate that. I'm here also.

[Ml601 in reply to Hidden]

Thanks🙂

[CatIsMyCopilot]

I know reassurance usually doesn't help me, but I want to give some to you right now:

"I think everybody is worthy of love but except me."

This is a lie your anxiety is telling you. It makes my heart go out to you to read it. I hope your anxiety can lift a bit, and you can see it for the lie it is.

I'm struggling too, to try to make more friends recently. Sometimes I think anxiety is making me ignore the connections I *do* have, which are all around me. Again, it's a trick anxiety plays, and it's not your fault.

[Hidden in reply to CatIsMyCopilot]

I know anxiety is a bully it has always bullied me around in my head telling me lies,I try so hard to fight back but then next thing I know I'm crying. Right now I'm some what calm. But idk how long that will last. But thank you for your response. You have no idea how good it makes me feel when people besides my mom and brother, is so understanding. Thank you. And I'm always here for anyone else who needs encouragement.

[CatIsMyCopilot in reply to Hidden]

I'm somewhat calm now too It's a nice feeling. I hope you enjoy the rest of your evening.