first post

[sheabutterbaby]

hi this is my first ever post in here and i’ve just been dealing with so much anxiety and my depression has been so bad lately. i don’t like to talk about it with my family and friends because i feel so bothersome but i also feel really close to my breaking point. how do you guys deal with this kind of stuff? i’m trying to find better coping mechanisms but nothing i try is working out for me

[Hidden]

Hiii, that's sounds really terrible situation. Exercise has been shown to boost mood and help both anxiety and depression. Therapy when you connect with the therapist is realllly effective and I just try going places doing things I enjoy but most importantly I use support from others. Your family and friends love you and want you to allow them to be there for you.

[sheabutterbaby in reply to Hidden]

thank u for replying

[Hidden]

You keep trying things till something just works.

I too use exercise. I use it as my release, my “me” time and I found enjoyment in it which keeps me doing it.

I have to get out in the sunshine too. My mood can shift so easily on grey days. Staying aware of this and my triggers helps me head off something that may spiral. The most important thing is making time for yourself if you are overwhelmed with schedules, work, etc.

I’m very lucky to have someone in my life that went through all this with me, he is still here and my reason for being and staying healthy. Never think for a second that those that love you do not want to help or you that burden them. Thinking that is part of the depression and anxiety talking. Keep plugging at this, you will find what works.

[sheabutterbaby in reply to Hidden]

thank u so much for replying. i’m glad you found someone who is positive for you!

[onthetrail]

Ditto what the others said plus, for me, meditation, yoga, positive self help books, and weeding the distractions and stresses out of my life. I agree that family and friends love and want to help. I got a lot of good general support when I was going through a breakdown. But, unless they've been there, other people will have a hard time understanding exactly what you're going through. Their ideas are worth listening to, but you are looking for your own unique path that's right for you. And you can find that!

[Ellie0509]

Hey, going through something similar too...

What really helps me is giving myself "me" time exercise, favorite TV show, cute cat videos, etc. sometimes what also helps me is to outline a plan to how I am going to get better.

[Want2BHappy3]

SMART to Not talk to friends and family, honestly they don't want to hear it. They may say that there here for you, after awhile they will start to avoid you because they won't want to hear about it anymore. I know because I've been through it. So I pretend that everything is fine. Are you in counseling? I do that and Medication has been helpful.

[sheabutterbaby in reply to Want2BHappy3]

no i’m not in any counseling yet but i think i’m going to start going soon

[Cyam in reply to Want2BHappy3]

I've had a similar experience with friends - they're willing to deal with things to a point, but many of them will duck out after a while when I'm no longer the happy/fun person they initially met. Making friends who understand what you're going through and are willing to talk through it is something I've been looking to do - so if you want to talk, feel free to send me a pm.

[Want2BHappy3 in reply to Cyam]

Yea, unfortunately that's when you know who your Real friends are. I have One friend who said she'd listen, but I don't believe she really means that? She depends on me to drive her places, she's 85. But I still wouldn't do that to her. My own kids isolate me.

[sheabutterbaby in reply to Cyam]

thank u so much for replying

[Essentiallyfree]

I'm sorry you're struggling right now. I used to be the person who tried to deal with anxiety/depression/self harm on my own and it was only making my situation worse. I was too ashamed to talk to anyone and even if I did I never knew where to begin. Don't let that happen to you. You are worth the help, you are worth the time and energy it will take to get better. You are worth it all. Don't let the lie that you're a burden to your family/friends speak any louder. If you don't feel comfortable talking to them because of the shame you feel, seek out a counselor and go from there. But don't believe the lie that you are a burden. Don't believe the lie that you should be ashamed of your struggles right now. This will one day be your testimony to someone else. Self love friend, is not selfish. I hope you're doing better today (I know this response is late now..) You are worthy and so loved. Believe it.

[sheabutterbaby in reply to Essentiallyfree]

thank u so much for the kind words, i really appreciate it

[Lulu02]

When I’m depressed and hide in my bed all day my mum would give me one goal each day which was to get outside at least once during the day. It felt like an impossible task but it was also the most rewarding