guilty feeling

[purl1]

I feel so guilty for not having a job. I feel guilty for getting laid off. I feel guilty for letting everyone down. I wish I would have seen the signs that they weren't happy with my work. I could've done better if I knew. I hate the guilty feelings I have when I go out to the store and I know I shouldn't be there. I should be at work. I don't know how to forgive myself for the situation I'm in. I take anti anxiety meds every day just so I can cope with the guilt. I don't know how I'm supposed to work again with all of this anxiety. my legs feel like they could run a marathon while the rest of my body wants to rest. I don't want to deal with this anymore. I want it all to be a dream. How do I deal with the guilt? I feel like such a horrible person.

[Kat63]

I feel the same way sometimes. I lost my job at the end of January. I look back now, and I see that I should have been looking for a new job starting at least a year before that. I feel guilty sometimes, because in our culture, there’s such an emphasis on jobs and work and careers.

Sometimes I don’t let myself go out and do things during the day because I feel like I’m supposed to be at work. Then I tell myself, even people in prison get to go out in the exercise yard sometimes. Why do I treat myself worse than we treat prisoners?

[JLoInCali12 in reply to Kat63]

I know how you feel. Please try to be gentle with yourself - you're doing the best that you can. Forgive yourself and allow yourself to have some joy in your life so you can move forward - punishing yourself will not help you in the long run...

[jkl5500]

I don't understand why you feel guilt over losing your job. Was it because of poor performance due to your illness? That certainly wouldn't be your fault.

I hope you are under treatment to get control of your illness. When you have it under control, you can always find another job, but first things first.

[purl1 in reply to jkl5500]

I did lose it because of my illness. I just feel like I could've done more to save it or maybe take a medical leave.Too late now though. I just feel awful about it.

[JLoInCali12 in reply to purl1]

You did the best that you could - as we all do in any moment. You will get past this and then, when you're ready, you'll get a new job. You are so much more that your job or profession and your health is more important than any job or profession.

Have you tried to define yourself by descriptors other than your job? Look at the relationships you have and the roles that you're in. Here's mine: I am a friend, daughter, granddaughter, niece, cousin, volunteer debate judge, volunteer gardener, volunteer job search coach, volunteer non-profit board member, neighbor, contributor to my community, crafter, confidant, advisor, connector, support group member and communication coach.

[DavMath2]

Things happen for a reason if you wasn’t meant to be at that job then hears your sign! My opinions of course but first things first help yourself before you can succeed and that’s ok!!!! As long as you see you have an issue and are trying to get help don’t stress it! We all have issues! I’m 35 married and kids and I can’t work due to my severe anxiety and I’m getting help with it! Keep our head up things will work out when they are meant to! God bless.

[lostgirl75]

First of all the guilt will go away it’s really not your fault if you got laid off. You didn’t get fired it’s a totally different thing. Being laid off means no work is available getting fired means you did your job insufficient. I got laid off from a major corporation with a big position and went through a major depression. So I know it gets better but here I am still not working because I have PTSD, depression, anxiety, fibromyalgia, ADD, and narcalipsy. I was told by my phychiastrist that I will not ever return to work which I’m fine with at this point in my life because it caused me so much stress. I’m grateful I’m off work so I can concentrate on just me and my family I no longer feel guilty and have accepted it as early retirement. I hope my story helps you feel better. We can’t control our bodies or minds sometimes so accepting it is easier.

[purl1 in reply to lostgirl75]

Actually it was their nice way of firing me. So it was definantly my fault. I feel horrible about it.

[Hidden]

Guilt and shame are big ones for me..they come along with the anxiety..I’m working on them in many ways..therapy, fellowships, knowledge , working on letting go, and understanding why I feel shame and guilt. Finding tools to help..being kind to me..

Your health is the most important thing. This is time out and recovery,

I’m sorry for your struggles it’s really not easy...in time things will feel different. I feel a little like lostgirl mentions here grateful I’m off work, to work on me, for the first time in my life...

Every good wish to you xx