Screaming For Help

hi everyone I haven't been here in a while I've been trying to do things on my own I enroll into a college online and I've been trying to deal with a lot of issues with my self and I need some advice on what to do because right now it's like I'm between a rock and a hard place right about now, I live with my aunt she's 82, and I try my hardest to get along with her, one minute she's ok and the next she's very negative to, she calls me a liar all the time for no reason since I moved in with her, and she doesn't care what comes out her mouth. She has two sons one in New Jersey and the other one is close to us he lives in Georgia in hamptonville he is in a state geologist he travels a lot and I understand he can't come but you know they say since I moved in that happy that I'm here but I feel like I was tricked into living with her to watch over her and I'm 29 and I don't have time for that I can't even have friends don't have any friends I didn't have a boyfriend because the way how she acts towards me and I'm to the point where if she doesn't change I am going to leave this love it or I do have my options but they're going to take forever for me to get an apartment and I do have my three little pets I love my babies my fur babies so much but she's very negative about them and me all the time , I get where I cry to myself , she has threatened me a few times

[Kat63]

Try to slow down and take some deep breaths. You say you have some options? It might help you to write them down in an actual list on paper, and go over the list when you start feeling anxious.

I’m scared too. I’m presently unemployed and next week I’m moving in with my boyfriend - we are trying to give our long relationship a second chance. I have a cat who his cat doesn’t get along with and I will probably have to rehome my cat. This is causing me a lot of anxiety and stress.

[Hidden]

Auntie sounds old and grumpy and set in her ways. Chalk it up to grumpy old people syndrome. If she needs the assistance, hang out. You just need to be you. Don't let her rabble get to you. She needs you. Your babies are part of you. You are young, you are doing school. You need time for yourself. Get out and have fun dating, experiencing life. She needs you, a healthy, well rounded person. She just needs to be reminded. She probably needs to get a life too. No one is too old for friends, going out, learning new stuff. My dad learned the internet and he was in his 80's, he loved it. If she won't budge and you are just miserable. Make a plan and get out. You don't owe them your life, your happiness. Happy you, happy auntie, happy life

[hypercat54 in reply to Hidden]

Very good reply butterpeanut and I couldn't have put it better myself! x

[AuntBee]

Your aunt may have a stage of dementia. This makes them irrational at times, cranky, paranoid (like accusing you of lying), difficulty finding words, misplacing items. Has she had a change in personality? If any of this is the case, you may want to talk to your uncles about taking her to a neurologist to test for dementia. It would be worth it to make sure that if you move out, plans can be made for her to be taken care of by someone else. If all is ok with her, you’ll at least know she capable of having a rational conversation with her and maybe then things can be worked out.

[Hidden]

I've tried talking to her, she won't listen, the way she keeps going I'll move out , I have PTSD and I really can't deal with her stressing me out , she calls me for every single thing I go to school online I gotta have time for my College work