Suicide

[lhortiz]

Good evening everyone.

On February 5th of this year my 31 year old son committed suicide. I have never felt so much pain in my life. I saw my other children suffering in agony. The absolute devastation is beyond words.

I must admit that several years ago I myself attempted suicide during a very terrible time in my life.

Now having experienced the other side of it I could never, never, no matter how much pain I am in, do such a thing to my family and those that I love.

It was all over him having relapsed from alcohol after his wife refused to restore their relationship. He dealt with extreme loneliness though he was surrounded by people. The rejection of his wife and the thought of having to begin the recovery process over again was too much for him to bear. He dealt with intense shame and guilt which contributed to his hopelessness. If he had reached out to others to let them know what he was going through he could have gotten through this.

He left behind 2 beautiful children who will never get to experience their daddy's love, pride and joy in their lives.

I am still grieving his loss and miss him terribly but I am a Christian so I have great hope that my son and I will be reunited one day.

For anyone thinking of suicide please reach out for help. There is hope.

[Calm_mama]

lhortiz,

My heart is broken for you and your family. I can only imagine the emotional pain you are in. Please know that I am praying that your days become easier and that you find peace. Sending you so many hugs.

[Emily16]

I’m so sorry for your loss. I just want to say thank you for sharing. I do believe your story will resonate with others. I hope you will save lives with this post. Your son and your family will forever be in my prayers!!💕🙏🏽

[aaronm]

You saved lives today in honor of your son. I must admit I have thoughts of suicide daily. Actually was just thinking about it. I come on here and talk to my friends who are continuously there for me. Then I read this post. I felt a sudden connection, love for you, and deep empathy. Your right. There is hope! Scream it! HOPE!

[Hidden in reply to aaronm]

Oh I hope there is hope as right now I am in a very bad place in my head.

[pink318]

Hi lhortiz,

My heart is broken while reading your post. I’m so sorry for your loss. I want you to know that you are in my prayers. Give yourself time to grieve. Please keep us posted.

I pray for peace and comfort as you go through this season. Please take care of yourself. God bless.

[Angry101]

I too am a Christian and have attempted suicide. I was on life support for 30 days. The doctors said I wouldn’t make it through the night. As you can see I did. The road to recovery was tough. What it did for me was it brought me closer to Christ. Now it is my testimony, that I give freely. He gave me a miracle one that I didn’t deserve, he showered me with blessings, and I didn’t deserve that. He sent me a clear message and that was to share with everyone. I’m so sorry about your son. You never know what is going on in other people’s head. I know I felt hopeless and no where to turn. Please keep me posted if you ever want to talk, I’m a very good listener. God bless you.

[Hidden in reply to Angry101]

I would love to know how you survived your dark moments and learned to love life again, I am despondent and really feel that I could make the suicide attempt. Thanks,

[dore13]

unfortunately, when people reach that level of depression, they see no way out. It is like tunnel vision, you see nothing but an ending. People need to get vocal with the government, and restore psychiatric care and hospitals to help all people who need it. In this day and age, we should not be letting this stigma and mental illness exist., people need help now. I am very sorry for your loss.

[Imaginator997]

I am so sorry for your loss, I hope you can recover from this, even I am at a loss of words all my feelings go out to you and your family, I wish you all of the luck and prosperity in the world. Feel better, maybe I’ll consider whether or not I should end my life.

[kenster1]

my heartfelt sympathy goes out to you and your family such tragedy rallying around each other is important isolation and loneliness after a death is really difficult.have you sought bereavement counselling please do. I had a cousin take his life at a young age who seemed to have it all life aint fair at times.god bless and take care.

[Lve2dance]

I'm so sorry for what you are going through ❤️. A friend of mine lost a daughter last year to suicide. I suggested through another friend who is the cousin for the person to think about going on this site.