My youngest son just got the final orders in his divorce regarding custody of his daughter. He hadn't shared that his marriage was unhappy in the past. However, a year ago his wife chose to leave him. Shortly afterward she falsely acccused him of sexually abusing his daughter. Fortunately, the investigation had already been completed and it was considered unfounded even before he knew he was accused!!!! At the temporary custody hearing over a year ago, she even accused him of raping her because she no longer had a libido! The reason she left him is she fell in love with a woman and is now in a commited relationship with her. There was a Parental Responsibilities Evaluation (PRE) done, which the examiner who saw through all her lies recommended that my son get primary custody. His wife was not happy with the result, and demanded a second PRE, she primed all of her witnesses with horrocious lies to tell - so he appeared to be a terrible person. Our plan was just to prove he was a good parent, not make her look like a horrible person/mother. The second PRE recommeded she get primary custody. My son is moving out of state to live with us, and go back to college so he can better provide for his daughter. His soon to be ex has a college degree, which she has NEVER used. The magistrate gave her primary custody, and we are devistated. I have never been a violent person - but I am having feelings of wanting to physically harm her - which I would NEVER DO!!!!! But, my depression and anxiety which was under terrific control since becoming retired in 2016 is reeling out of control. I was able to reduce my meds drastically after retiring. I just don't understand how the magistrate couldn't see through her lies, and the fact that she left him for another woman! Where is the justice? To top it off, this has cost us around $25,000 so far - he has no money so we have been paying the legal fees. So ridiculous, it could have gone toward our granddaughter's education.
Didn't get the result we hoped for - Anxiety and Depre...
Didn't get the result we hoped for
I really hate hearing how the court system can be suckered into believing in everything a "mother" says just because she is, well, the mother! And to falsely accuse someone of such despicable things is so unacceptable! My ex sexually abused my granddaughter but left the state before we could prosecute, even with all the evidence the SVU had on him. Howerever, I do believe in Karma. And I'll be darn if it didn't come back to bite him on his butt! And I don't think it's done with him yet. I'm proud of your son for going back to college to better himself for his daughter. He truly loves her and is putting her first. What his ex did to him, WILL have consequences, trust me.
I agree with you. I'm a firm believer that there is a plan, we thought it was for her to come to us during the school year. Now we just have to wait this out to see what the plan really is. It may be to prove she really dislikes being a mother and just didn't want my son to have her! Also to wait and she how this adulterous relationship pans out, which I'm counting on it failing. She leaves a LOT of the childcare up to her partner, she will not do well as a SINGLE parent!
That is scary, what you just shared! I am concerned for you and the children. Please keep me posted on how things go? I would appreciate it. I"m here for you if you want or need to talk.
We brought our son "home" yesterday. The ex, came up with another trick - not giving him the title for the one and only thing he asked for from the assets that wasn't a personal item or a gift from a family member. I fear her antics will never end. At least she allowed him to see his daughter for a few hours on the last day he was in state.
God that's just really awful. Can you appeal it??? Can you talk to this judge privately in any way? Can you explain how this has already cost you so much money and show how manipulative this woman is being? There must be something that can be done!!! Where there's a will there's a way. I would not hand a child over to her unless you've done all you possibly can.
The magistrate gave the ex the majority custody plus complete decision making in temporary custody , so she obviously was in her favor from the beginning. She also ruled that my son pay for half of the second PRE. Unfortunately, we don't have any choice in the matter. At least the magistrate gave him shared decision making for all major decisions this time. As time goes by we are hoping the ex will make huge mistakes that will prove she is trying to alienate him as a parent and we will be able to take her back to court for full custody.
I am so so sorry.
Such outrageous injustice.
I guess the next legal step is too expensive?
Horribly so, I don't think she's ever going to let it go completely. It's just going to be a waiting game.
X
Oh! I feel for you. Anyway you can get another judge involved, there has to be ways to get this sorted out. Can you go to someone in the State that can give legal answers? I do not understand that the first judges ruling was not final? I am not a religious person, a spiritual believer and will pray for you as I am sure other people on our web site will. I send you strength, power, peace, lots of love and many big hugs.......
I appreciate all the good thoughts, thank you! My granddaughter is a strong girl, and she loves her daddy very much. Some how the bond will stay strong, and the right thing will eventually happen!
What did you expect? Your son was born with male genitals, he's automatically unfit to care for his children. His ex could've banged a speedball into her arms in open court and she'd still be a more fit parent.
Interesting word picture! But you are correct. Her mother (a retired elementary special-ed teacher) told me during the early part of the separation that "it is very important that the child be with the parent of the same sex for the greatest amount of time or they will suffer mental illness." There is bias in the minds of many people. My son has been a nurturer since childhood. He loved the homemade "cabbage patch" doll his grandmother made him, became a massage therapist and is now in school to become a nurse (like his mama.)
I hope he gets his kid. I can't stand sorry excuses for people who try and steal children away from their fathers.
This is horrible. I'm so sorry your grand daughter first and foremost, was drug into this. Divorce alone is terrible, and then to pull something like this is ridiculous. I'm sorry for your son, and what you all are facing as a family. This is heartbreaking. And completely unfair. The justice system in this country, if you're in the US, I didn't check, has proven ineffective for me countless times. So I completely understand what you're saying there.this is just horrible.. can you keep us updated on this over time? I'm curious to see if your son will be able to reunite and have this little girl
Thanks, I agree! We just got back from a 5 day trip bringing him "home." It's going to be a rough ride for him not being able to see his little girl often. She is his heart! The sad thing is, the ex went through this with her mother treating her father horribly through their divorce and she hated her for it! Now she is taking advice from her on how to make his life miserable. Divorce is a nasty business - it destroys families. I fear when the "in-love" stage of her new relationship ends, the relationship will end as well. She will not do well as an single parent, she relies too much on her partner for support. Only time will tell, we can however love and support our granddaughter from afar until the times we are able to bring her to us.
Just because she's a lesbian doesn't make her a bad or unfit mother.
Being a lesbian does not make her an unfit mother, I agree. But, being an adultress makes her a terrible example to her daughter!!!
It's her atrocious lies and her desire to deprive her daughter of a loving father. She's committed the crime of perjury, her lying friends have too. She is the one who has been unfaithful, not her daughter's father. Is she setting a good example?
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