Support

[cdp002]

Hi everyone. I suffer from what at least I think is depression. I'm still 17, and my parents are super religious and don't really believe in doctors or medication for depression, so I am just forced to deal with it on my own. When I was younger, I suffered physical and emotional bullying and developed an eating disorder, which I still struggle with. I just feel really sad all of the time. I barely have enough energy to get out of bed or do the things i love. I don't really have any close friends, and the friends I do have don't care about my issues. I can't talk to my parents either, so I thought this was my last resort. From an outside view, it would seem as if I don't have much to be sad about. I am a good athlete and I was just recently accepted to an ivy league school, which would make someone think that I should be very happy. However, I feel so bad about myself all the time, and I don't really know what to do. I have intruding suicidal thoughts and obsess over the idea of suicide. I've written several suicide notes. It seems as if there is a dark cloud following me around all of the time. I feel so alone, I just need someone to talk to.

[Iloveart7]

Welcome! You will find lots of support here 🙂

[cdp002 in reply to Iloveart7]

Thank you!

[AZ1970]

Are you in the US? Have you spoken with a guidance counselor? It sounds like you need treatment sooner rather than later. You do have reasons to feel the way you do. Don't discount your pain and suffering. I am glad you reached out. Welcome.

[cdp002 in reply to AZ1970]

I am in the US. I go to a tiny private school, and we don't really have a guidance counselor. I have a health teacher I could talk to, but our school is so small I think that they would call my parents

[AZ1970 in reply to cdp002]

You are in a tough spot. I don’t want to give you ideas or advice that would make things worse for you. Another idea is to speak to your doctor. Post to us when you need support. There is almost always someone on to respond.

[deb4598]

Please hang in there and continue to reach out to those that can help you. I am new here but I relate so much to what you are going through. I care, and so many others do also.

[cdp002 in reply to deb4598]

Thank you!

[RoseFleur]

I can relate to some of what you’re saying - I’m in the US too and I hope you can find peace. Some similar things that you experienced have happened to me, and I’m still in undergraduate,

[Enoiewa]

Please go to hospital or urgent care if you need to. They can help you go through this. You’re 17 so you don’t need to have a parental consent to go to hospital or doctor’s office. They will keep your information out from your parents unless you give them a permission to your parents. Hospitals will help you navigate what’s best for you. They have professionals for this kind of situation. If you believe in your parents’ religion, try to seek help from your religion group if you can. I have a daughter who’s almost 17. She went through this last year and she’s getting much better with a lot of help from doctors and other professionals. She is an athlete and she’s smart just like you. Please seek help. I’m thinking about you a lot.

[maslater]

The disease of depression has nothing to do with your circumstances. Don’t feel like you shouldn’t be depressed because some things are going well. Have you asked your parents if you can see a doctor?

[Skydreamer42 in reply to maslater]

Sometimes emotional and physical abuse is a cause for depression, and that is legitimate also

[APOR2017]

cdp002, I am heartbroken that you feel this way. Please tell your parents and your health teacher how serious you are thinking. There are many programs that can help you. I know you told your parents about the depression, but the depth of the depression is far. You are so special and have the rest of your life ahead of you. Big hugs! Please keep talking to us.

[Skydreamer42]

I am glad that you found this website. It is healthy to talk about your problems and seek answers. You deserve support. Most people do. Don't let yourself feel alone. A very good thing to ask is: "Are all these things I want for myself, or were they wanted of me and expected of me." Ask yourself what do you care about, what do you want... Is what I want different from what my parents want. These are important questions for someone growing up. I wish you luck.