Feeling safe!

[Donndonn1980]

One of the worst feelings to have is to not feel safe. For me I've had my bouts with Paranoia but that was usually when I had ingested illegal substances. Other times is having anxiety attacks. But then I wonder is it truly anxiety situation or is it instincts.The things I've been through in life make it hard to tell at times but I do my best to pay attention to whatever it is. It doesnt help being around undesirable folks either and not having my own space that I can entirely control. I wonder why anyone or ppl u do for and never done anything to would allow anything negative to come your way and not help or would themselves have I'll will and bad intentions towards you. Being honest where I reside I dont feel completely safe but having my seeds there makes me have to stick around as to not leave them in a situation I dont like myself. They are innocent and cant make decisions for themselves so it's up to me to hurry and gets us all away from this madness or dysfunction. It's all the same. I'm trying so hard and would be much easier if I had a conscious partner that had any sort of sense. Her being born into the dysfunction makes her ok with it and not see how much it effects the children and myself. It's not fair at all. I take my safety seriously as well as my kids so why is it so hard to convince a person to get away to have and do better? Peace of mind is something everyone should want and it boggles me how much one can be entertained by chaos and misery. This shit is so not good for my mental well being. I just want to be feel and know I'm safe again that's all. Life is so much more beautiful when u feel secure and have security. When u have to have weapons to have a false sense of security it's sad and I know I dont wanna continue to live like that so I have major decisions to make but I gotta be strong and patient so I can make a right decision for my children and myself. Anyone not with the plan will be left behind. I'm gonna go hard for myself and kids.I will change our current circumstances in Jesus name!!🙏🏿✌🏿💯