Feeling lost : My dad passed last year... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Feeling lost

Mary2009 profile image

My dad passed last year 12/27/2017. I'm feeling so angry, I can't see my family acting like every thing is ok planing Christmas party but I know every one are different. I only think about why my dad left, I know he was seven months in bed with cancer but I was happy standing next to him. I want all this feeling disappear but is not easy at least for me.

5 Replies

I understand how you feel. I lost my mom almost 30 years ago this Christmas. I think they would want us to be happy & thank goodness they are no longer suffering. Remember the good times you had with your dad, it's better than focusing on their death. I wish for you peace of mind. Love, peace, light, joy & hugs for you!

I lost my Mom on 12/7/2014 after a long battle with cancer. She was also bedridden. At the end my Mom refused treatment and was asking God to call her home. I was praying with her.

I have 5 brothers and each one of us felt differently. Some argued that she had to keep fighting...some were on her side...some said nothing.

Each person deals with loss differently.

One of my brothers has spent thousands of dollars on her gravesite...even buying the 2 plots on either side of her and putting in benches.

Another is there every other week changing the flowers and the lights.

I have never been to her grave since the funeral and never intend to go.

Mom always said people have a right to the way they feel. Feelings can not be right or wrong.

And I agree with Anxiety. Your Dad would not want you to be sad for him. Ever. He wants you to smile...remember...and celebrate his life.

And celebrate yours.

Please have a Merry Christmas. For you, your loved ones, and your Dad.

I understand your feelings. My dad passed away November 9, 2016. We were close. Holidays are horrible! Christmas was the only holiday we celebrated as a family when Dad was alive. Now mom insists we get together for all of the major holidays. Grrr!! All I think about is not the same without "Bub" (my oldest 10/91-7/15) & dad.

I lost my oldest daughter in April this year to cancer. I have tried to think of her with beautiful memories. She was ready to go too. Please understand that your dad would not want your life to stop. He would want you to be filled with memories of days when he was whole and happy. The sooner you realize his desire for you to continue to do the things that make you happy and move beyond the angry stage the better your health and happiness will be. Moving beyond does not mean any way to forget him, but just to remember him, and your love for him. Enjoy the family you have left, and know this might be the last time you all get together. We never know what and when our lives will end.

I'm sorry to hear that your father passed away last year. You are not alone with your feelings. Since I have experienced loss, I know that bit.ly/grieving_takes a lot of energy. Have you considered honoring him in some way this Christmas? Did he have a favorite tradition that you can carry on? I hope you can find some comfort.

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