My parents were divorced for about 10 years before my mom died. I traveled between houses multiple times a week, a 30 minute drive one way. Some weeks I’d have to stay with my dad more than my mom. Other weeks I was with my mom a lot.
Now that my mom passed away I have to stay with my dad full time. I’ve posted before about his behavior, but that’s just one layer of the awfulness. His house itself is absolutely disgusting. It looks like a hoarders house, my brother always lays on the couch and leaves dirty dishes and trash there. My dad smokes too so everything smells like smoke, including all of my clothes. We have two cats and they pee and poop in areas that aren’t their litter box. We have a back hallway that leads to my bedroom and my brothers bedroom and the cats always poop and pee on that carpet. It is disgusting.
I’m expected to clean up a ton too, because my brother won’t do anything. I’m extremely busy, so I never have time to clean or organize. Plus, when I do clean/organize, my dad and brother mess it up not even a day later.
I walk in and it smells like smoke, cat pee, and cat poop. I have to douse myself in perfume before we leave to go anywhere so that I don’t smell like smoke. But it doesn’t work, I still smell like smoke all the time anyways. People have pointed out the fact that I smell like smoke a lot. It makes me extremely insecure.
My moms house was safe for me. She didn’t smoke or have gross pets. It smelled good, and we often had wax plug ins that were scented for the different seasons. Our favorite was the fall scents. I would wash my clothes there and be clean and smell good. Her house was clean and not disgusting.
Also, I play viola, and I need a good practice space in order to practice good. I had a good place to practice at my moms, but at my dads my room is too small to dedicate a corner to my music. We have other bedrooms but they need remodeling work done because they’re gross. I don’t practice much anymore because I simply don’t have a space to do it. It sucks. I also don’t have much time to practice but that’s my own fault for procrastinating, and for not being able to focus.
I need to practice for upcoming competitions and auditions but I actually can’t