Hi I’m New

[yeetmydudes]

Hi I’m new to this site. I have social anxiety. I can’t go to therapy and have no one in my life that I feel comfortable talking to so I came to the good old internet where I can remain anonymous to get some decent advice. My mom who I usually talk to about stuff doesn’t really think anxiety is a real thing as far as I can tell and wont put me on meds or take me to therapy. And when I try to talk to her about it always feels like I end up being mocked or yelled at for something I didn’t do. I know she loves me and maybe I’m just being over dramatic but idk I just needed to vent. I try to do what all the internet things say to. I do stuff in front of large crowds and interact socially to the best of my ability but it never seems to be enough for her and I’m left even more stressed with no one to talk to. I mean I have people I could talk to but they have their own problems and I don’t want to seem selfish or crazy. Well I’ve vented enough. If anyone has any advice that’d be fabulous. Bye for now I guess.

[hypercat54]

Hi I presume you are a minimum of 16 so can't you take yourself to therapy? Are you still at school? In which case there should be a counsellor there so why not make an appointment to see them? x

[LadyO4]

I'm so glad you felt courageous enough to share your thoughts here on this website. I know sometimes it's hard revealing your deep concerns to a stranger, so hopefully you can feel comfortable in the company of those who really do understand.

You may feel your mother is mocking you but I believe her actions are just a cover up for something she doesn't understand, and therefore, she prefers to not get involved because that would mean another responsibility on her part. It may be, that in her generation, no one discussed the depths of these kinds of issues, and felt like a person "suffering" should just make the most of what they have and move on.

Anxiety is very real to those who are gripped by it, and it should not be taken lightly. So to feel threatened or shames by your mother is very sad to me. Anxiety is rooted in fear, which involves your brain and adrenal gland. I would hope your mother can at least agree to have those two areas checked out.

Do you live at home? That is all the more reason why you need your mother's encouragement every day. Maybe you can write her a letter - and spell out in plain English what she needs to hear. You are her daughter and you have a problem, and you need her help. Ask her why she is unwilling to help, and see what her answer is.

if you want to talk more, please feel free to get in touch.

[yeetmydudes in reply to LadyO4]

Thank you so much for your advice. It was really hard to post that and I’ve been stressing about it since I posted it.

[LadyO4 in reply to yeetmydudes]

No need to stress - you are in good company. Everyone here understands these kinds of emotions, so there is no reason to fear. You took a first step in overcoming your fear by writing and sharing your burden. Everyone has to start somewhere, so I commend you for reaching out and giving yourself a chance to be encouraged. Let others help you - it's ok to lean on people who want to be strong for you. I hope and pray you will find the courage to keep moving forward.

[Hidden in reply to yeetmydudes]

Relax...breathe, friend. It really is okay to share here.

[Lazy_dog_lover]

I found a therapist who took my insurance without a copay. She is pretty young, but nice to talk with. I don't talk to family or friends at all. I wrote journals for a long time. This week has been a tough one. I miss my creativity most. Are you under aged and that is why mom is in charge of meds? By me, failure to provide proper medical care can be reported, but that is a big step. Keep looking for someone to meet with.

[momonthego2019]

I found two great articles I think you'd like. One provides tips/techniques in how to talk to a therapist when you have social anxiety. Even though you aren't going to a therapist right now, you can still apply some of the tips/techniques right now and in place of a therapist, if there is a teacher, pastor, or someone that you feel comfortable confiding with you can use some of the techniques listed with that person. Most important tip mentioned is to 'give it time'. The other article is about Albert Ellis. He was a psychotherapist who in his younger years dealt with social anxiety. He tackled the issue head on and was able to get over his anxiety (which was a fear of talking/approaching women). He has written lots of books so if you find the article interesting you can continue to read other articles on that page or go to your local library and pick up some of his books. They are really interesting. Good luck to you!

How to Talk to a Therapist bit.ly/2OfS0sP

A Bronx Tale bit.ly/2xaou0h