Is it all really worth it?

I suffer from severe panic disorder with a side of social anxiety and depression and I’ve just torn my acl in my right knee, so now I’m on bed rest - I’m also being tested for bechets disease. Some days are ok, but some...like today...is it really worth it? My friends have disappeared and my parents just moved 4.5 hours away, it’s just me. Im just sitting here crying and thinking, will it ever get better

[rsherma]

Hi Rydel,

Yes it will get better, so just hang in there. I know how painful these feelings can be. If you can, find someone to talk to or sit with; it always helps me. These feelings want to make us isolate ourselves, so just being around people helps.

A couple things that might help:

1. Prayer

2. Meditation (the Calm App has lots of guided meditation)

3. Journaling: just write any and all thoughts that disturb you

4. Practice deep belly breathing when you feel anxious, then simply observe the thoughts without judging yourself (this takes time, so don’t get discouraged if you’re not perfect at it right away).

5. Start each day with listing all the things you’re grateful for, like warm showers and hot days.

I hope this helps. And remember, time heals all wounds, so stay strong!

[Hidden in reply to rsherma]

Thank you

[Hidden]

It will get better. In time. I use to get bad panic attacks and still have social anxiety. I had surgery like 2 weeks ago and am told by doc to rest only. I want to leave the house but I can’t do any driving any of what I use to do. I have to find what I can do instead do.. Someone here suggested to me perfect time to do mediations. Mood tool apps, insight timer, etc.. as far as friends come when then they really never were if they left.. There’s plenty of fish in the sea I promise .. I’m working on myself first ..you will heal soon enough. Get educated, knowledge, self care is essential. You are not alone!

[IheartDogs]

I'm so sorry about your ACL and how you're feeling, I know it can be so hard on some days. Maybe you can take this time and dedicate it to you, just focus on small steps to getting better. It all starts with something small in the right direction. A few ideas are meditation, journaling, reading books and watching videos about healing yourself like Ted talks or YouTube (rewiring your brain, positivity). And yes, it will get better. Just keep moving 💕

[Hidden in reply to IheartDogs]

Thanks about the TED talks - my brain can’t concentrate on books quite yet and meditation...unless I’m completely calm, can’t do it. But videos I can. Thanks again.

[Hidden]

Hi Rydel - sorry you’re having a rough time at the moment. Hang on in there - anyone facing the things here you are would be struggling - there’s nothing unique about your reactions, it’s a tough time and so being upset is natural. Let it be, but don’t dwell in it. Find the small joys and work from there

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thanks for your reply - I try taking little steps every day but some days get the better of me. I’m just so frustrated and sick of being sick.

[faya]

Maddisun, this is my first day on this website. It’s creepy how many postings resonate with me. Don’t know if it helps, but I’m here today bc I have a really hard time sustaining friendships too. I mostly live a fairly isolated existence, especially when my kids are staying with their Dad. I’ve been divorced x 8 yrs, following 16 yrs married (plus an additional 6). I was diagnosed with bipolar2 about 3 years ago. I wish that it had been figured out years before that, lol. I’ve tried so many different med combinations, it’s shocking after not taking anything for yrs. i just have a few people that I discuss it with and usually that’s really rare. Some days, I do well with the help of my meds. Today, I’m really struggling since I didn’t sleep last night. I feel really lousy and highly irritable, somewhat anxious - grateful that I have the day and house to myself and don’t have to pretend to anyone (other than to the librarian briefly) that I’m fine. I feel like I’ve made some steps in self acceptance. What choice do I have? Apparently, this is my new reality. I’ve been struggling for over 10 yrs. I hate how slowly piecing it all together takes. Or when I have these “off” days, especially with the insomnia.

My other ongoing frustration is that I can’t find energy and/or mental strength to exercise and my mental health nurse practitioner keeps reminding me how much that should help me. Exercise used to be a staple for me though always a challenge. Mornings are always tough. Congratulations on sharing what’s real for you! It was helpful for me to hear about your experiences.

[Hidden in reply to faya]

We all have our struggles and from what I’ve been reading - we’re all very similar. I’m glad I found this site , it’s a godsend being able to share your cruddy day with someone and usually get a reply.

Friends, ugh, the select few are sticking around but most don’t want to hear it or be near it. It really hurts cause we all tend to care so much and would do anything for our friends yet when we need them they disappear. It makes me so sad and then I too get really irritated so I hear you.

Exercise - no energy at all. Now with the bum knee, I’m on bed rest. Tbh, I never really was into exercise but they do say it helps with our illness. I like riding my motorcycle and this season, I’ve been grounded completely - not a happy camper.

It’s 2:25am here so I understand your insomnia, lol.... I do hope you are getting some sleep now and glad to make you realize that you’re not alone in this

[faya]

One day at a time. You have a long recovery ahead of you. That motorcycle ride can be something that you look forward to....keep your eyes on the prize.