Fml

[Olivia_crossing]

Every day just gets worse and worse. I can’t even get out of bed. I can’t do anything productive. Fuck this.

[realityhigh8]

I'm new to this but just read your post and want to let you know that I have been there too. What seems to be troubling you?

[Olivia_crossing in reply to realityhigh8]

I have depression

[thatjuanguy]

It’s always worth trying you fail when you give up and if you want to talk about your troubles I’m a good listener.

[Olivia_crossing in reply to thatjuanguy]

Okay. Thank you

[Hidden]

Precisely! I have to take action when I feel that way. Get out of bed 1st, because you know you can, you know you can! Then drink some coffee for around 30 minutes, mess with your phone, then get cleaned up and dressed. At this point, you can stop and congratulate yourself ☺️👏🏻 on a job well done! This is where you start adding goals, like, “I’m going to the grocery store today” Do things that need to be done to lighten your load. Try using baby steps to get to your destination...it works! Wishing you the best!

[Olivia_crossing in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for words of encouragement

[Hidden]

What are you depressed about?

[Olivia_crossing in reply to Hidden]

I just have depression without any reason. I have nothing to be depressed about, but I still feel depressed and anxious constantly.

[Hidden in reply to Olivia_crossing]

Do you have too much time to yourself?..

[Olivia_crossing in reply to Hidden]

I have had more time to myself lately which is making my depression way worse

[JS1981 in reply to Olivia_crossing]

I am sorry you are feeling this way, I know it sucks. I have the same problem. I get really, really down and I can not explain why. I have a good job, good family, nothing really to complain about in life. Yet, I still struggle. Sometimes it lasts a day, sometimes a few days, sometimes weeks. It always seems to pass but I know it will be right back. I wish I could give you some advice but I think you know what you need to do, and so do I. I know when I’m feeling like this it seems impossible to do anything. I wish for you strength to get through it and keep fighting to find what it takes to get you right. I’ve been fighting for about twenty five years or more I know it’s hard. There seems to be plenty of people here to talk you through it. I am not good at giving advice but I am always willing to listen because I know how it feels to hate life.

[fauxartist in reply to Olivia_crossing]

your right about that...you don't need a reason to be depressed...you just are. That's because it's a chemical deficiency in the brain, and you can either take SSRI's to try and find that balance again...and even with that you are still going to have the emotional ups and downs just not so bad. There is no cure, just management and coping skills.

[Hidden]

Why is that?..not the time to yourself but what is it making it worse?..

[Olivia_crossing in reply to Hidden]

When I have too much free time, my mind becomes more depressed because it doesn’t have anything else to think about like work or school.

[Hidden in reply to Olivia_crossing]

There's your answer..what do you think about then?

[Olivia_crossing in reply to Hidden]

Well I knew why I’ve been more depressed lately, but I still deal with depression even when I have a super busy schedule. And I don’t really think about “depressing things” when I’m alone, it’s just a feeling that develops in my head.

[Hidden]

Yeah I know..it's worse when you have to much time to yourself..we need to be preoccupied with things.. also, it is a chemical imbalance..

[Olivia_crossing in reply to Hidden]

Yeah, when I was on Prozac it really helped with my mood and basically everything. Unfortunately I’m not on it anymore but I did purchase natural mood boosters on amazon recently and I hope they can help me.

[Windy101]

If Prozac helped you, can you go back on it? I'm a big believer in depression being a chemical condition in the brain that some people (like me) are predisposed to. It runs in my family. I get it wanting to try a natural solution. But, it sounds like it's not working.

One more thought. You have to be getting up to go to the bathroom and get drinks of water, and, hopefully, eat. When you do, tell yourself you will do 5 things to straighten that room. If you can't do 5, do 2 or 1. I don't have a dishwasher and this is how I usually get my dishes down while listening to podcasts. I hate washing them, but I can wash 5 at a time, lol.

If you're not taking showers, force yourself to do it. Let the warm water run over you and the scents of shampoo and soap comfort you. Put on lotion, deoderant, and clean clothes. You can go back to bed if you want to.

I'm a student who's been home all summer, mostly isolating though reading a lot for my thesis. As much as I don't want the school year to start next week, being around people is going to be good for me. Chatting, laughing with overs, just a hi to someone lifts my spirit. The fresh air and sunshine of walking to class will also be a big boost.

Warm wishes to you! We've all been there. Fortunately it happens at different times, so we can give each other wisdom and a boost. You will make it. Just stay alive today. That's really all you have to do.

[Olivia_crossing in reply to Windy101]

Unfortunately I don’t have the funds to pay for Prozac right now. I haven’t started taking the natural antidepressants yet because they haven’t been shipped to me just yet.

I like that idea. I think I will try it the next time I’m having a hard time getting out of bed. Thank you.

I also have been doing good with showering because I hate feeling dirty lol, so at least that’s something I’m able to accomplish.

Yeah, I’m a college student as well and not looking forward to the starting semester. I’m not much of a social person due to the fact that I’m an introvert. I only really socialize with my boyfriend, my family, and I have 1 friend who I see sometimes. Going to school can sometimes be dreadful because I hate being around so many people.

Thank you for all of your love and support. I would love to chat with you sometimes if you would like.

[Windy101 in reply to Olivia_crossing]

I'm a student, too! And older student, but one nonetheless. This is my last year in a master's program. I have to take comprehensive exams, write a thesis, and teach! Is there a generic for Prozac? If so, it might be cheaper than you think. In the states, Walmart probably has the lowest prices. I'd rather not take generics, but I do because of costs. Let's definitely stay in touch through the school year - sounds like we both could use support. BTW, I'm an introvert, too. Turns out lots of people in academia are.

[Hidden]

I really wish I knew what to say to make you feel better. Part of me wants to say find a reason to get out of bed. Mine are my children but honestly I don’t think that’s made the pain go away. I get up easier because I have to but it’s like everything in my life just weighs so much and I’m so tired of carrying it all.... I’m beginning to wonder if my problem is that I can’t take pride in anything I do or have ever done. None of it seems impressive to me. I started trying to change how I think about my life the other day and it worked really well until sleep deprivation caught up with me. If this works for you I hope you can find something to take pride in soon or a different way of feeling better

[SuZQ154]

Olivia, you are doing well! You are posting and coming to grips with your feelings! You seem to want to get better and have a support group. All this is good.

We wish we would not get depressed. Yet, we do. My encouragement is that there is hope. Keep reaching out! Seeing a Christian counselor, going to support groups, posting here are all wonderful strategies to cope with depression. Also, you might consider a Bible study. I was amazed at how those helped me to get a better perspective on my life. Hope that you are pulling through this time!