End it all: I thought this site would... - Anxiety and Depre...

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End it all

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I thought this site would help me, but it really not.

I went to a therapy to talk and the therapy was right I don't any dream, It made realize that I'm pathetic. I wonder why the people I know call me so many names, why to put me down, why say no women will ever love you, you deserve nothing, and much more. They are right. I have no purpose, worthless human being, I don't love myself, I don't care about self, I don't even care about my life. I'm beyond broken, I will always be broken. I'm okay with that.

I grow up poor, I been abandoned, I'm not attractive, I been abused, I lack faith and hope, I Stop believing, God punishment, pain, emptiness, worthless human being, unlovable, lack confidence, much more.

When people have faith and hope, friends, a family that cares about you, support system and much more. It gets them through the toughest time of the life. That what makes you human.

All can do is keep moving.

48 Replies
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Are you on meds to help with low mood zeld

Good Day!

You are not alone and this community is here to help support you and not bring you down. First of all you bring up alot of issues in your post and it takes to time to work on each one. The first thing you need to do today is ask how are you feeling? Do you feel down? How can you feel just a little better? Maybe go for a walk? Maybe find something you enjoy eating? Maybe just listening to some music. In order to truly work on your sense of self you have to find a happy place within your self. Its there I promise!! Find something today that will make you smile... its just about you.. not about anyone else!!! Take each day as a gift and work to make it your own.

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Keep fighting Zeld. Therapy is always really tough at the beginning, especially because it's the often the first time that a person is truly confronting and addressing their problems. This is a very painful process, but it's a massive step in the right direction. You are really brave to take this step and speak to a professional about your life. Keep moving forward with it, one step at a time and be very patient with yourself. You are suffering and you need help. It happens to many of us. The therapist can help you, but it will take time. Be patient with yourself, especially after a therapy session as it will stir up your emotions and sometimes you might feel worse before you feel the benefits.

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in reply to Hidden

Yea. But Still I don't care anymore

fauxartist
fauxartist
in reply to Hidden

we care....and we know your hurt....

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Don't care about what?

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in reply to Hidden

the therapy said some hurtful stuff. But I don't care.

fauxartist
fauxartist
in reply to Hidden

they may or may not be a good therapist....but if you cannot trust them, they are not the right one for you. There are good ones, and you just need one that is a good fit for you.

I agree it might just not be a good for for you. Keep looking for one.

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So do you mean the therapist said some things that upset you? Or that the process of seeing the therapist brought up some thoughts and feelings that are painful for you?

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in reply to Hidden

Both. I'm fine

fauxartist
fauxartist
in reply to Hidden

what did the therapist say that hurt you zeld....

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in reply to fauxartist

when the therapy said that I don't have any dream.

fauxartist
fauxartist
in reply to Hidden

do you mean the therapist said you don't have any goals in life....a dream of doing something with your life....something you would want to accomplish in life....

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It's very hot and sunny here in the UK today. I've been indoors mostly the last few days though as been feeling rough. Are you at home or outside today?

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in reply to Hidden

Home. It hot outside in the USA

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in reply to Hidden

Do you like the hot weather?

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in reply to Hidden

sometime

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Are there things you sometimes like to do outdoors when it's hot and sunny?

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in reply to Hidden

Workout and reading books

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Maybe you could do something like that today? Treat yourself to something you enjoy doing? It's important to do nice things for yourself.

Your not the only person who grew up abandon my friend... I did too, and I understand that horrible pain, your not alone any more...and it's not the site that let you down....it's the people who should have been there for you in your young life, the ones who should have been there to protect you, love you, and take care of you. They are who is to blame...not you....it's not your fault. You have always been lovable....and you have always deserved to be loved.

You just have not figured out how to trust yourself enough to believe that yet...but you will. There are no quick fix's, no magic pill to take and make it all better...no one person has all the answers for you...no one can make you feel better ....only you can do that. And your understandably hurting....so let others love you till you can learn to love yourself.

You have all these people here willing to talk to you, they are kind, caring and only wish the best. I'm sorry you had a bad experience in therapy....but sometimes when we are told a truth....we don't like what we hear....Also...sometimes a therapist can just be a knucklehead and say stupid things....just because they are a professional does not mean they are not human...and this is just one of many out there. Don't give up because of this one therapist....and don't give up on sharing here either....just keep venting, get it out...tells us everything....we are here, and listening to you.

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in reply to fauxartist

I don't know. But I try

fauxartist
fauxartist
in reply to Hidden

I have to try every day zeld too..... I fight those feelings of self worth and knowing my mother will never know how to love me....but the reality is....she has lost out in knowing me, and I am loved....and I am an okay person with friends that do like me for who I am...the good and bad parts of me.....but zeld.....that took many many years to learn those things...your life can change....your life can get better.....

make a promise to yourself right now, and forget about what anyone else has said bad to you for a moment....only you matter right now at this moment..that you will try today....right now.....to think of making a better life for you....

If you could do anything you wanted to do in this world....what would it be.....and know that you can do what ever you put your mind too..tell yourself you can be happy some day.....and that you will become your own loving family, and you will be a loving person to yourself and also to others in need.....that's how you begin healing zeld....let others love you, and you help others.....expect nothing in return for what you give...give it freely...that is showing love.....and here...you will get the same....care that is given freely,...I want nothing in return but to know that you accept that you do have someone who is taking the time to write to you.....and wants you to feel better...because I do care...

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in reply to fauxartist

well, I appreciate that wisdom. But like I said, I 'm tired of trying to get better and there isn't any good thing about me.

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in reply to Hidden

There are so many good things about you. I just know it. Try to find that one thing you love & focus on that. Please don’t give up. We are here for you & we care about you.

I see you got so many replies which is great! Don’t get overwhelmed with responding to everyone. I know things seem hopeless. But keep talking on here and with a therapist.

Whomever is calling you names and treating you badly, DELETE them from social media and get them out of your life! That is so wrong. Some people are just cruel. You are NOT! You are a million times better than them. You’ll find a good support team on here and maybe go to support groups in your area. I let go of so many toxic people over the years and it really does open up space to let good people in! You take care of YOU right now and not worry about them. The more you focus on yourself and get better, the more you’ll attract good people.

Try to write a list of positive things about yourself today. And the past is the past. There’s always hope for new positive changes! We are here for you zeld 🤗❤️

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in reply to MariaLove123

There isn't any good thing about me. Like I said I don't care anymore.

MariaLove123
MariaLove123
in reply to Hidden

Of course there is! How old are you? What do you like to do? Do you work? You need some good energy.

People on here care about you pal,keep your chin up you can do this.

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in reply to Sillysausage234

They shouldn't care about me. I'm not saying in a mean way.

fauxartist
fauxartist
in reply to Hidden

well....we do care....and that is one truth ....the other is....you have to change....as much as I would want to fix you....I can't. You are another broken soul like so many of us here are, me included....and the only one that can put the pieces back together is you. One piece at a time.... I hope you do find a way to start this process.... I know I don't care either when I have been in that pit of despair, as so many of us here have and still do go to with this horrible disease... but the one thing we can all count on is change. It does pass....it does get a little better after a while....we are always here....you know where to find the support when you need it....

Why zeld you’ve reached out on here and some lovely people want to talk with you they do care

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Hey honey, my name is Kayla. I’m so sorry to hear that this is what you feel about yourself. Therapy can be really hard at first, but if you can keep trying - it can always get better. You’re not always going to be broken. You can get through this. Please keep fighting with us. We are all here for you to talk to. Keep writing here. Everything will get better. I have faith in you. If you need me, lemme know. xo

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in reply to Hidden

I don't know anymore

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in reply to Hidden

I know how that feels. You’re not alone with this. I fight every single day to live. It’s really hard sometimes. I’m so sorry you’re going through this. You have a friend in me, if you want one. <3

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in reply to Hidden

You have a friend in me from toy story. I guess

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in reply to Hidden

That’s right! That was one of my favorite movies as a child.

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I guess. I try again

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in reply to Hidden

Thank you. Keep fighting with us. We are all here for you.

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It's definitely not an overnight process. Therapy is a lot of work and a lot of commitment. This support group is heree whenever you need it. You have the tools. It's up to you to decide how to utilize them. Remember, you can talk to any of of us here. You may feel alone but you're not alone.

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You need to love yourself before someone will love you. What you present is what people will return to you.

Believeinyourself123
Believeinyourself123
in reply to Hidden

That's a tough one but it's true.

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Yeah I am learning it the hard way myself. It’s not easy.

Believeinyourself123
Believeinyourself123
in reply to Hidden

I think you can do it. A good friend of mine will say "baby steps". Find one small thing even if it's your eyebrows that you love about yourself.

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I don’t care the way I look physically. It’s my mental illness I hate.

I'm sorry you are dealing with all these emotions. As for the name calling delete and block them. You don't need people like that in your life. You need positive vibes from good people. This site gas helped me and give it time to help you too. Best wishes my friend.❤

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