Challenging situation next few days

[morenews]

I am going to be among not very close people next few days. Social event. I have a lot of physical limitations to participate in a lot of activities. And explaining that and say “no” to people who would like me to have a good time, makes me very nervous already. I am sure I will have some good moments, but mostly it is a challenge for me to go thru this event which would be for 2.5 days!

Any advice how to talk and behave not to feel embarrassed and generally how to sirvive that.

The answer: not to go there...would not work. I am going for sure.

[Coolasacucumber]

Hello,

I say if you’re already feeling anxious about explaining yourself and saying “no” maybe try to tell yourself that you really don’t owe people explanations- saying no/declining is enough.

Although if you feel they are sincerely asking why, and you feel inclined, maybe open up and just say I have a few physical limitations and you could leave it at that. And you saying no is ensuring that you do have a good time because you are taking care of yourself and your needs. And if they really want you to have a good time then these semi-strangers will respect your self preservation for saying “no.” And who knows, maybe others who also wanted to say no, for whatever reasons will be inspired by you, and decline their offer to do those activities. Maybe they’ll join YOU instead to do non-physical activities. Maybe you could even do those together. Even if that’s just sitting around and observing or chatting or drawing or whatever it is you like doing!

I hope that this helps you get through those 2.5 days.

There is no shame in saying “no.”

Sincerely,

Cool As A Cucumber

[morenews in reply to Coolasacucumber]

Thank you, what you wrote makes a lot of sense.

A lot of that I do understand on intellectual level... emotionally accept and follow is more difficult. But it is very helpful to read this from people who understand.

[Coolasacucumber in reply to morenews]

You’re totally right. I’m sorry if what I said sounded emotionally insensitive... From what it sounds like it already is taking a lot of guts for you to even go on this trip, which is a big accomplishment.

And I wish you the best!

[morenews in reply to Coolasacucumber]

Thank you, no, you sounded very reasonable and helpful. Yes, it was not an easy decision to go in the first place. But even after I got tickets and decided to go I got additional obstacle: have some foot inguiry which have created more limitations for me than I knew about. Well I have to deal with all of those things. And I hope it would be still not as bad as I am anticipating.

[b1b1b1 in reply to morenews]

A foot injury is a perfectly reasonable reason not to participate in certain activities. I think people would understand this.

[Hidden]

You can do this! Stand strong & Positive. I sure hope all goes well for you & you end up having a great time!!! Love & Peace!!! XXX

[morenews in reply to Hidden]

Thank you 🙏 yes. I will do this and will be fine, being positive already

[Hidden in reply to morenews]

That's great news!!! You will get yourself through this, I know it may be a challenge but afterwards you can congratulate yourself & have that positive thought about how you did get through it!!! Peace & Love!!! XXX

[gerrerd]

just relax

[morenews]

It is ok, guys. I am managing so far. Walked a little more today than my foot wants to tolerate. Took aleve now. I am happy I am here and did not ran away from the situation but I will be also happy to be back home.