I have had trust issues for a long time. I remember when I was younger, my best friend in first grade stopped being my friend and then I never knew my birth father and he never wanted anything to do with me. My best friend from like 4th grade stopped being my friend in 7th grade when she became a beer leader and she said I wasn’t cool enough anymore. It seems like I would feel abandoned after guys would break up with me and then a lot of them cheated on me. One cheated on me and got another girl pregnant. Another said he wasn’t talking to another girl even when I found proof.
Fast forward to now, I have an amazing boyfriend who I have always wanted. He has never given me any reason not to trust him. I can only see him once or twice a week because he has his daughter Wednesday to Saturday and I won’t meet her until next month. So when I am not with him, I feel the need to text him all the time or speak to him on the phone. I feel like I keep seeking reassurance from him that he loves me and won’t cheat on me. He still is in contact with his ex wife because they share custody. She texts him at random times about personal stuff or crying to him because she had a panic attack. She’s very attention seeking. He doesn’t respond to those messages unless they deal with his daughter. He tells me when she texts him or calls. I try not to ask if she talked to him each day. I hate asking because it makes me sound like a clingy girlfriend who gets jealous. My anxiety gets the best of me and it comes off as I don’t trust him. Him and I have talked about when I act like this and he said he understands it’s my anxiety so he just deals with it but I want to let him know I trust him. I do trust him I just can’t help my anxiety. What can I do?