very unhappy today

[littleorange8]

i was in an emotional fight last night which left me to have a nightmare replaying a worse version of the fight (i would write what it was about, but i have received some negativity on this forum when i was transparent about my issues). i woke up this morning feeling an overwhelming sense of fear, helplessness, and worthlessness. my friends asked me to hang out but i don’t know if i should. i want to study today but i can’t even get up because i’m thinking “what’s the point”. i feel like i just want to end everything - it’s not like the world will stop if i left. i’m feeling so lost, unhappy, and scared. what do i do?

[fauxartist]

hey pal...forget about who ever that was that gave you negativity....and sometimes I miss read someone's intentions, and think they are not being nice....but it was really just me not understanding....so please feel free to write what you want....your pain is as valid as anyone's....you hang in there...glad your sharing....nighmare's can be very unsettling.

[littleorange8 in reply to fauxartist]

a while ago, my emotionally abusive boyfriend came back saying he’s changed so i chose to believe him one last time and give him a chance.

last night on the phone, i told him i’m grateful for everything in my life, but he said “no you’re not” and started listing all the reasons why i’m not (ie. complaining about work). so, i got angry at him (because who is he to correct me on how i feel) but he ended up yelling at me for being angry and said he doesn’t want me anymore. i told him i opened my heart to him again, because i thought he has changed and is going to truly love me. he said he only came back because he forgot how much trouble i was. he said he hopes i find someone else so i can stop bothering him with my unhappiness.

i just feel so worthless. i know i shouldn’t feel this way but i can’t help it. i am forcing myself to go out with friends later today to see if it will help, but i think when i get home at night, i will cry myself to sleep again.

when i shared my feelings on another post about a woman being abused, i received long feedback saying it’s “these women’s” fault for being with him and that we’re stupid. so i have been afraid to talk about it

[fauxartist in reply to littleorange8]

he set you up for the fall women....he's a jerk. first he bates you in the phone call about 'you you you'...and then when you get angry, which was what his intentions were, he has an excuse in his warped mind to be even more hurtful. He is a waste of space, and a waste of your time....he's making you out to be the bad guy, when he really is. Stop beating yourself up over this clown. You are no different than a lot of women who fall pray to these jerks who get their rocks off hurting women....pick yourself up now....dust his crap off you....and know your a good person who has been abused by a bad one. You didn't do anything but trust them and they betrayed your trust...that is on them...not you. You are hurting now, and you will for a while...but while you are healing...really really be honest with yourself....were you wanting a relationship because of the fantasy of everything changing....or deep down were you just really in denial of the reality of who this jerk really is. ....that's happened to all of us....and you have to look at this when your feeling a bit stronger as a learning experience of what you DON'T want in a relationship. They say you can never go back completely once the trust is gone, I believe that. Everybody deserves to be loved...but after something like this....it's a good idea to give yourself a good long break and learn to love yourself again...get to know you and what you really want. So you don't repeat the same mistakes...we make better choices when we are more stable emotionally, and that just takes a little time.

[2stroke]

Please don't do anything that you'll regret,cos believe it or not there are people who love and respect you.

I'm sure there are a lot of members on this site would always try and help you😍

[Hidden]

Try to ignore negative feedback. What kind of person would answer someone asking for help with negativity and criticizing? I am thinking this person will be contacting you again. Have you thought of what you will do if that happens?

[littleorange8 in reply to Hidden]

you are right. this person always blocks me off when he wants to (ie after a fight) and then talks to me after a few weeks saying he’s changed. how did you know?

[Hidden in reply to littleorange8]

Kinda been there done that. Lol!! Some people enjoy playing drama games. I hate drama myself!!

[littleorange8 in reply to Hidden]

ugh it sucks right? the worst is that it’s super hard to break things off for good because they twist things to make it seem like they left in the first place because it was your fault! how did you end up breaking things off for good?

[Hidden]

Found someone who really cared!!! You deserve to not live like a yo-yo. It is playing games with your mind and heart and it’s not fair.