No clue how to turn this around.

[arcknight]

I'm 31, I live alone. I feel like I should at least be in a steady relationship bye now but I'm not and there are several roadblocks in my way.

Although I have had many friends and generally don't have issues with making friends I have not maintained any past friendships. This makes it hard to get out and meet a girl.

I have some debt, Its actually about average from what I find online but I still feel guilty about it. I wont get ahead of that unless a move in with a roommate after my lease is up. I feel like no female my age would want to be with someone who has debt. Either way it could take a good amount of time to get taken care of.

I'm not what most females are looking for, at least not ones my age. I look a lot younger then I am. Everyone tells me its a good thing, but I can't relate to girls that fit into the age range that I look like I am, nor do I ever really encounter them.

Thinking about all this is giving me extreme anxiety every night. I have trouble getting to sleep most nights because I end up thinking about how deep of a hole I am in and that things only get worse and worse. Its effecting my work performance, only adding to the anxiety.

I don't know where or how to start. I do know I need to make a significant change in my life.

[hurtingheart1]

Sorry to hear your having this anxiety,stress & worry!!🌻😕but hope you can not be soo tough on yourself- take some deep breaths ,try 2 relax -maybe some calming beautifl music could help& remember that everyone grows and moves at their own pace/time table not always 1 size fits all!! & sounds like you want to improve things soo that's a great place to start fresh from!!👏☺️Just keep setting small goals for yourself-maybe even small ones u could do every day to get where u want to be- exercise maybe, healthy diet, improve communication skills, strengthen & build meaningful relationships with good caring people you admire-stay focused on your dreams -maybe journal and write down thoughts to help organize them &post on here as well( I know this is kinda what I'm trying to do for myself as well because I've felt need to be in a diff place in my life now as well and it's been hard at times-I've had bad relationships with guys but prob did not take enough time just working on myself, loving me&bettering me! but also whilst helping others as well in ways I may be able to that others can't relate to?)anyway &Maybe before you know it- when u least expect while your busy being the best you you can be you'll meet a great girl that will be at the right time?? But maybe don't try to force or push for things b4 you're ready?-just some thoughts hope this can help at all!? wish best to you!!😊

[arcknight in reply to hurtingheart1]

That sounds like a good idea. I have been thinking about going back to the gym. I use to go a lot in the past. I also need to make goals and probably start off small. I feel better at the end of the day when I accomplish something.