New and feeling discouraged

[Coleman24]

Hi - I'm new here. Had depression a long time ago, and then anxiety about six years ago... went to the hospital for it and an outpatient treatment program which helped a lot. Since last June, I've been in a depressive state, and lately anxiety is showing up again. I'm trying meds, seeing my therapist, and doing what they ask. I'm not feeling much if any relief. It's such a hard way to live. I'm usually outgoing and happy, but now I feel as though it's a struggle to get through each day. After so many months, it just really drags one down. I guess I'm looking to connect with people who understand. Thanks!

[AnxietySterling]

Hi, I have GAD and panic disorder and yes, it is overwhelming. I am also really tired so I do understand how hard it is plus with anxiety I also get weird pains that make me think the worst. I think anxiety has ups and down and sometimes it is so hard to keep going. I am hoping I will feel better soon which I know I eventually will and hope the same for you. Try to meditate, stay busy, exercise, etc. Even if you have to force yourself to do it. Best of luck to you.

[Coleman24 in reply to AnxietySterling]

Thank you so much for taking the time to respond. It is very tiring. It really helped to hear the words "Even if you have to force yourself to do it." I've been an avid in exercise and meditation and have let both things go. I will go exercise today - even if I only do it for a little while. Thanks again!!

[AnxietySterling in reply to Coleman24]

Anytime. I am also trying really hard. Good luck today.. I hope it helps.

[Ashleigh429]

Hi, I’m new too and feeling very much the same. I have never done well with medication, I can’t seem to get past the adjustment period which always makes me feel super crazy and interferes with my ability to do my job so I have to stop them. The level of my depression and anxiety varies depending on my feeling of self worth which sadly is tied to body image and validation through romantic relationships. Days have been feeling very difficult to get through lately but am trying to force myself to walk and do yoga and have thrown out all the unhealthy food I would use to feel relief for just a moment. I’m also hoping that maybe this group can be a support as I’m really tired of being such a drag on my friends, they say I’m not but I feel that way.

I hope your day is going ok!

[Coleman24 in reply to Ashleigh429]

I really related to what you said. The medicine is a nightmare - side effects, adjustment, change the med, repeat. I've also spent a lot of time on body image/approval from men tying to my self worth. Has always been a very core issue for me. Have a great therapist who has helped me tremendously in this area. I can now say that I'm happy with my body because I'm happy with me - spent a lot of time working on this - I guess I just wanted to give you hope that you can and will come out on the other side. Now if I can just improve in the areas of depression/anxiety!! I, too, am sick of talking about it with friends and family because it just feels like "something else" -like I always have something going on... yesterday I was thinking though it's not a good idea to keep it inside, that's why I reached out to this group.

Thank you for your understanding and really helpful post!!

[Ashleigh429 in reply to Coleman24]

That’s great to hear that you have been able not be so tied to the whole male validation thing, I very much struggle with this and my recent previous relationship was probably about the worst. On the positive side, it really brought to light how much I rely on external validation in general and especially from my partner to feel good about myself. Part of my anxiety is very much of the social nature, I constantly feel started at and judged physically as well as very concerned with saying or doing something “wrong”. I get almost agoraphobic when it gets really bad.

I def agree that it is not a good idea to keep it inside. Same reason why I decided to try this out. I can’t keep just letting my thoughts fly through my head and not let them out. It starts to make me very on edge and short with people which in turn makes me feel bad :(.

[Coleman24]

I was the queen of external validation! It still creeps up, but fortunately I've been able to gain some self confidence that really helped. I also get irritable and short with people when I keep things inside. I just don't want to bother anyone with it, because I feel like they'll be thinking, "This again! Aren't you ever just happy?" I'm trying!! Thanks for understanding!!!