Days away, everytime I think about everything I have been thru..makes me sick in stomach..
Like the shame..hurt..abuse.. is all what makes my life up..everyday I wake up look out my window expecting everything to just vanish..
That no...just gotta keep going..
Honestly I don't even want to keep going keep pushing thru.. feels like an endless battle.. not on any meds yet..
As bout now I have meds..
I will do something to end this suffering...
Is why I haven't been put on them as yet..
Don't even wana speak..speaking is gonna make me out to be all my fault.. guess it's probably my own stupid fault for believingin people.. To the end where I get stabbed in the back..walked all over.. used.. an then pushed to aside..
Why do I keep putting myself in these situations.. guess I just rather see the best in people.. then that just gets taken for granted.. friends are never there..
Not that I have any.. 🙈
But I really see now.. its only ever you in this world.. no ones really out there to help..
Hate it..hate it.. hate it with a passion..
My life nothing good great or exciting about my life.. just one big Disappointment..