Hi there. Here's a little bit of my story. I've always been a more anxious, "Type A" person, but have been able to live a fairly happy, productive life. Married, kids, successful career, the whole bit. Unfortunately, a year ago, it started to go awry. I gained a new boss at work, with whom I definitely do not get along. Everyone else that I worked with before has left because of the difficult situation.
Along the way during this past year, I started to suffer from some health issues. First, just a day every once in a while of feeling like I had the stomach flu. I spent 3 months earlier this year with severe upper back pain, requiring weeks of physical therapy to come back under control. And now, since July, I've had "spells" or "episodes" of feeling weak, having a racing heartbeat, hot flashes, trembling. This has led to numerous ER/Urgent Care/doctor visits and every test under the sun (heart monitors, blood pressure tests, thyroid tests, adrenal gland tests.) So far, all good news - there's nothing physically wrong with me.
But that's a little hard to hear when I still feel so terrible most days.
I didn't realize how bad it was until I "self-identified" as depressed during a doctor visit. This led to a leave of absence from work, with the idea that if we could separate the stressors, we'd see if there was really a physical issue going on. I'm still not sure if that was a good idea, as now I don't have that to focus on and the symptoms have become worse.
I've tried Lexapro - didn't react well. (Basically, I'm not very tolerant of any medication.) My doctor wanted to try Wellbutrin, but when I followed up with a psychiatrist, he said that wasn't really a good option for those already suffering from a racing heartbeat and anxiety.
So, for now, I've been seeing a therapist. She has said a lot that makes sense and gives some comfort in all of this - that it's transitional, I functioned well before and I will again, and that I need to remind myself that I'm healthy.
However, as before, it's difficult to stay with that thought pattern when I really don't feel well most days, and I have such difficulty eating...to the point where I've lost weight I couldn't afford to lose.
I'd like to know if anyone else can identify with this story and perhaps give some encouragement as to what I could do next. Thank you for your help.