Crying alot

[Lynl]

9 months ago my sweet dog Shadow who I had for 17 years passed away , and a few months hater my 27 year old son moved out , only about 20 min away and I get he is 27 , but I miss him so much , we do talk and see each other once or so a week . I have a husband who is good to me , just not much of a conversation person, I have a 15 year old daughter, she's awesome and I have a 4 pound mini yorkie. I have terrible health anxiety and worry all the time , always calling doctors. I have acid reflux and just had a colonoscopy and egd scope and the said it was mild colitis. I feel sad and lonely because I can't shake these feelings. Normally my son is my " go to" person when I need to talk or cry. But I fight to not do that to him because I don't see him as much as I used to so I want to seem happy and normal when I see him. I feel like I'm losing it and I'm normally a fun outgoing person. Help

[Roseanne333]

I know exactly how you feel. Sometimes you feel like your going crazy. I don't know if this helps, but there are a lot of us out here that are going through similar feelings. It feels like your going to burst sometimes. I see other people that look like they have it all together, and I am not buying it. Everyone has issues and problems. Some days are just harder than others. Get through best you can, and know you are not alone. I was crying all the time and my doctor but me on Zoloft. It helped with that issue, but still get that panic thing that starts in the pit of my stomach and seems to last forever. Hope this helps a tiny bit.

[Lynl in reply to Roseanne333]

Thank you , I take Xanax and citalopram. But don't always take citalopram.

[Roseanne333 in reply to Lynl]

Does the citalopram work? Is it like zoloft? I take Xander too, my insurance company quit paying for both meds. So angr with them.

[Lynl in reply to Roseanne333]

They should have never stopped your Zoloft . It's two different types of meds, Xanax is like a bandaid , Zoloft is long term. I have the least amount of side effects with citalopram, but it sometimes messes with my stomach and I had a stomach issue and just hav'nt started back yet.

[Roseanne333 in reply to Lynl]

Yeah, me too. I have IBS along with everything else..the D kind

[yeja]

I feel your pain nine years ago in the span of six weeks I lost two uncles and my dear dad, six months later our 11-year-old dog passed away and a few months after that a dear friend of mine died of cancer I thought that I could not breathe another breath but like they say time heals and my father I think of daily and talk to him. we rescued another dog six months later , my children are grown both married ,moved out but in the last four years they brought me four grandchildren!!! so whenever something seems like it's the end of the world something else opens up thank God for your daughter your your son your husband and what you do have . it sounds like you have a beautiful relationship with your son which is very special I have the same with mine and I'm sure if you ask him could you bring dinner could you meet for coffee once in a while just give him his space then you will have those little special times to look forward too he's just learning to be on his own

[Lynl in reply to yeja]

Thank you, ad I'm so greatful for all I have and my family and my son is always willing to talk me through my problems, but I try not to do that to him , he has some anxiety too. But we are there for eachother . My husband is too , I think he just dosent know the right thing to say.

[gogogirl]

So sorry to hear about your dog- animals are wonderful , and I have a dog myself. I have been through other dog losses, and the pain is terrible. I am happy that you have another dog and a family to help.

[Hidden]

I'm so sorry. Losing a beloved furry friend can be devastating. I lost two of my dachshunds just two weeks apart in March. One after a year of hospice care, I cared for her 24/7. I had a breakdown after they passed. We adopted another furkid and I love her dearly, but I cry for my two "heart dogs" every day. Anxiety and depression intensify grief. Especially when you feel like you have to hide it. The worst thing you can do is try to keep it bottled up. Can you go see a counselor? I didn't want to burden my friends and family, so I started therapy which has helped me so much.

If you're prescribed medication, take it regularly. You may feel weird for the first 2-4 weeks, if it doesn't provide relief after the first few weeks, see you Dr and they can adjust the dose or try something else. Meds can make the pain and fear easier to deal with.

I wish you luck and I'm here if you ever need to talk.

[Lynl in reply to Hidden]

I know and feel your pain, I also broke down after I lost Shadow, it's been 9 months and I don't see it getting much better but I have to push forward. I found out I have colitis mild form but my OCD is crazy. I'm on Xanax but have not been taking my citalopram and my husband said he noticed a big difference when I take it so I guess I will. Thank you.

[Windy101]

Counseling can be such a huge relief. It might help to have someone to talk to who will really listen.

A grief group could also help. Not only have you lost a pet, but you're starting the empty nest process. That's a lot of loss.

I've been through that heartbreak and sometimes I didn't know how I could stand it! I just kept thinking of how much I missed when I had a little girl around. I had to make some changes in my life, so I felt more fulfilled personally. Now I'm really enjoying her for who she is at this age. But at times the old feelings still come back. I think many moms feel this way and it's normal, but it's very, very hard. Our lives revolve around our children, and then they are gone. We have to find a new purpose, though of course we still love them dearly and will always be moms and hopefully grandmoms!

With a daughter still at home, you now have more time for fun with her! And it will get easier, I promise. You have given so much to others. Soon it will be YOUR time, to focus on yourself and the dreams and goals you may have forgotten about while being so busy as a mom. Before your daughter also leaves, it might be good to think about what you'd like to do with the next chapter of your life. As hard as it is, in some ways it is also very freeing. We get so used to living our lives for others that we can forget who we even are.

[Lynl in reply to Windy101]

I have started worrying OCD health anxiety and I have always had this. But now I have colitis mild and on meds, and even though I feel young , I'm not handling the empty nest and my daughter hangs with friends a lot she is a cheerleader and very busy and I'm lost

[Windy101]

Yes, so now really is the time to put yourself first for a change. It's okay not to handle the empty nest very well. I don't think many people do. Go ahead and let yourself be said. I think finding a support group for grief could be really helpful.

[Dawns520]

I understand how your feeling. I also struggling with health anxiety. As I'm getting older I have developed a chronic illness and other health problems. Years ago I lost my oldest son in a car accident. A year after that I went through a divorce. Then my daughter moved out. My youngest son still lives at home but he will be moving soon. I feel so all alone! I also lost 3 of my four dogs! My last one is 11. Just dreading the day she's gone! Thanks for listening.

[Lynl in reply to Dawns520]

Oh Dear Lord ! I'm so sorry, so much to ho through ! I hope you have close family support, God Bless You, and we are always here to listen. Life is not an easy thing, it's hard to keep things together . I try to keep xtra busy. And still thoughts overwhelm me

[OB73]

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