I'm writing here because I can't go to bed with it alone in my mind. I'm going to bed deciding tonight that I'm not going to make it my last day. I go through this everyday when I wake up, and when I go to bed. Does anyone else have this experience? I'm literally putting one foot in front of the other, and feel not joy, no happiness; no feeling but feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and despair. I'm exhausted by these emotions. So, so tired..I'm tired of fighting this battle everyday. I'm tired of "being", of "existing"