emotional...

[jewlz17]

my head is swimming with thoughts. i called my one friend to calm me but hasnt worked lately. she told me to write but all i want to do is cry. i keep telling myself things will be fine just take things day by day. i think of my son and i relax a bit but part of me worries that he will grow up and see the struggle i go thru emotionally that he too young to understand now. hurts to feel alone even when im surrounded by family and love that i want to feel but dont. i see it and know it but feeling it hasnt come in so long. my family knows about it but they dont understand and its not something easy to explain.

[Suz65]

Hi jewlz

I am sorry you are struggling. We have to learn to turn off these negative thoughts that are consuming us. I really believe if we replace these with positive thoughts it has to relieve the mind spinning. Our minds and body can't do opposites at the same time. I sure hope this makes sense to you. I am typing while I am anxious so it may come across all messed up.

[jewlz17 in reply to Suz65]

thanks Suz.

dont worry i do understand what you mean im sorry your a bit anxious but i appreciate the advice. its just not easy for me at the moment and i can be a bit stubborn with myself with taking advice but im trying to handle it just wish my mind had an off switch sometimes.

[Suz65 in reply to jewlz17]

Honey I sure wish we had that switch! It would make life so much easier. 😂💕

[jewlz17 in reply to Suz65]

😋 yes I know I do hope you feel better too. I'm hear if you need me like you are for me right now

[CaptainCrunch]

I don't think it is possible for someone to understand stand unless they have gone through it. Similar to a man trying to understand childbirth. I try to remind myself this is making me stronger for my kids. Everyone likes to be a winner but learning how to be a good loser is even better. Your dealing with something hard. And you are here reaching out for help. That takes strength and humility and I want my kids to know life can be very hard and very unfair but you can survive it. You can keep moving. You can keep breathing even if that is all you can do for this day. One day they will need your strength and your example. It is hard now. Even horrible. But you are not alone. Please keep posting. We all need each other.

[jewlz17 in reply to CaptainCrunch]

thanks captain.

your right its not something they dont understand. at times its like they dont even want to which is fine but hurts more when they argue that its all in my head. it makes me feel like whats the point of telling you if thats how you think. i will admit you have me crying happy tears because when it comes to my son his one reason i keep pushing myself even when im drain at times.

[poodlelover81]

If you don't have that off switch you might have ocd. That's what I had.So many "what-ifs" and my mind just kept on racing. My dad used to say it's all in my head too. Thankfully it is treatable. You might want to go to a psychologist that specializes in cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT).

[jewlz17 in reply to poodlelover81]

I have and I do have a moderate case of OCD at least that what they told me but it was never this bad growing up they wanted give me more meds but I said no because I raise my kid alone.I'll be okay but thanks