New here

[jschullo]

Well here it is. I am in my third bout of depression in seven years. I have a 15 year son with high functioning autism and a 9 year old daughter. I am on 200mg of sertraline and doctor will not add additional because it would be too risky because I have diabetes as well. I am married but my husband has been living in the garage or basement for the last couple of years going through his own personal demons. He has recently lost his job. I work from home as an independent contractor for a company, therefore making very little. Very thankful for the company because they are very understanding. I have not been able to get myself out of bed to work the last couple of weeks but I have been able to get the kids off to school. I can not afford this house on my own nor the amount of all the credit debt that my husband has racked up through the years. Yes, I'm an enabler. I am afraid my depression will not get better because of this situation. My mother wants me to move back home with the children, but that means taking them away from school and friends and just letting the house go into foreclosure. I'm 44 years old and feel like a complete failure.

[Mustang99]

I'm sorry you are going through this. You are brave and doing the best you can. I too am dealing with depression and today was tough. I didn't make it to work. It's great your job is understanding. I can't offer much but a listening ear and prayers.

[jschullo in reply to Mustang99]

Prayers would be great! Thank you!

[malim in reply to jschullo]

just to say you are not alone. I have been struggling with severe depression and anxiety for last 6 months following the death of my sister, the breakdown of my marriage due to my husband battling his own demons (and alcohol), a second sister taking a near fatal overdose and one of my daughteers taking an overdose and still struggling with her own mental health issues. My life feels completely out of control and I feel a total failure at the age of 57. I work from home and struggle on. Last few days have been very hard.

[jschullo in reply to malim]

I really do not know what to say, we have some very similar issues. Maybe we could help each other out or lean on another now and then? I wish I had some answers but as you can see for yourself, I do not.