New here!

So I have depression and anxiety obviously why I'm here. I'm not good with support groups in person because I get really anxious and don't like telling people my story. So I have struggled with depression since I was 15 years old. And now I am 21. So I've been dealing with it awhile. I've had attempts on my life like 3 times. And recently almost a week ago I was admitted to the hospital for suicidal thoughts and plans. My boyfriend took me and I was willingly going. And now im on these new meds. And their making me feel weird. Im very forgetful now, and kind of talking to myself not being able to focus and every everyday noise that you don't think about is enhanced so everything's loud! Anyone have any idea if that's normal? And this post took me 18 mins to write bc I am so distracted and forget what I'm trying to say..

8 Replies

  • My little cousin took her life two days after thanksgiving. Don't stop fighting. You are special you are worth everything. You are someones everything. Keep fighting the battle you can and survive. No matter what happens during the day there is always tomorrow to figure it out. Don't take that away from yourself. My little cousin didn't only take her life she took the life of her little brother whom now is missing one of the most important people in his life and wakes up wishing she was still here he was and is one of the most amazing humans alive. The day she took her life she took a part of him that may never return. Her mom is destroyed she will never be the same. She was my rock and there is nothing I can do to make it better for her. So not only she take her life she took the lives of all she loved with. I know she fought so hard to get better. She wasn't in the fight alone. Her mom was in her corner doing everything she could to help her. Unfortunately the fight was lost. We had to plan her funeral she had her whole life in front of her. Her family couldn't afford to burry her. Somehow they managed to borrow money to pay for her burial. Every month when they pay that loan it is a reminder of their loss. not that they need a reminder because there is a place she once was and can never be replaced. I guess what I am trying to say is no one can ever fill the void once you are gone. You are unique and your place in this world matters. Fight the fight allow people to help you. Go get more help take your meds. Do what it takes because there is no one out there like you. If you were gone tomorrow you would be missed and would never ever be forgotten. Don't loose yourself keep fighting.

  • Wow I'm so sorry. Yeah I completely understand. I'm working on getting better. Taking it day by day. All ya can do honestly. Eventually one day in the future maybe I'll be content but for now I'm working towards that feeling.

  • Don't be sorry. I am so sorry you are going though all of this. I just wanted you to know. Even a stranger knows how important you are. Hang in there.

  • Thank you!!

  • I know how you feel. I find it hard to share stuff too. Hope you get better Alyssa. 🤗

  • Sometimes I find it hard to want to go on in this life. I'm stuck and I can't go forward. No one can share to get help. Feeling isolated. There's people that would wanna talk but I'm afraid they just want to gossip about me. I just wish things were different. I'm also having hard thing to get pregnant it's a complicated hopeless story.

  • Well I'll be thinking of you and hope you continue your journey and keep trying for a baby! If not there's plenty of kids who want and need to be adopted in the world! You will become a parent. And it will feel amazing... single mum here

  • Thanks I hope so too. Will keep up as much as I can. Wish you the best too

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