Learning about aniexty and depression - Anxiety and Depre...

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Learning about aniexty and depression

dawliwalli profile image
28 Replies

Hi all, I'm new here I'm trying to learn more about anxiety and depression as this has been a struggle for my husband. I've always known that he had a little bit of anxiety but as he's started his own business in the last 4 years I've seen a huge change in him and his stress and anxiety haven't been managed properly and I'm sad to say that he is constantly battling his anxiety and it's getting the best of him. He feels hopeless. And I have the hardest time knowing what to do or how to help him. We have two little girls, a two year old and a 11 month old and they are a handful. I am a stay at home mother and I'm constantly feeling burned out and I know my husband is too from work stresses. I want to help him in any way I can but at the same time I feel so helpless and neglected myself. I worry about him getting meds that will be habit forming or have negative side effects. I don't know how to help him out of this. I'm am 100% committed to him and our family. I want to help him in any way that I can, his well being and happiness are so important to me!

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dawliwalli
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28 Replies
Mendyjem1 profile image
Mendyjem1

I would try a counselor/psychologist that specializes in cognitive behavior therapy to help him cope. These types of therapists aren't hard to find and will usually be covered by health insurance. The tools they offer are strategies to manage anxiety/stress-inducing thoughts

If that fails to help him cope,meds are not a terrible option. I personally take celexa which is an SSRI, and Its really helped me cope with my chronic anxiety and depression. And with barely any side effects, if even any.

Of course, consult a doctor first before doing any of these. But there are plenty of options out there for your husband. I wish you all the best.

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to Mendyjem1

I was curious does celexa cause weight gain, and is it good for depression as well?

I have been taking 5 htp and gaba ( herbal)

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to gogogirl

I'd love to know as well! Does 5htp and gaba do anything for you?

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to dawliwalli

I am an older person. What do you do physically? I am sure that helps as well. I think the 5 htp and gaba do some good, but I still have anxiety and depression. However , I think I notice differences when I do not take them . I also take an herb from India called ashwaganga( spelling)? for anxiety as well. I do not have anything else to compare with.

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to gogogirl

This would be for my husband, who is usually very physically active and works out a lot. He hasn't ever taken anything for his anxiety. But his anxiety has turned into depression so we are looking into how help him.

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to dawliwalli

I also wanted to add that of course when I am more active and the sun is shining that certainly helps as well of course.

Mendyjem1 profile image
Mendyjem1 in reply to gogogirl

dawliwalli and gogogirl i have used celexa for close to 7 years and haven't had any weight gain problems or really any side effects. And i suffer from mostly anxiety which also triggers depression. So it definitely helps with that. I am also very active physically so I'm sure that has helped with weight and my moods

I was at 20 mg until recently when I went up to 40 mg due to recent events. But I plan to go back down to my original dose once things even out a bit.

I also haven't tried the 5 HTP or GABA. How do you guys like that?

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to Mendyjem1

What would happen if you did not use celexa especially since you exercise - I am sure that helps a lot. It seems that at least sometimes- emotions are the responders to events. Thank you and all the best.

Mendyjem1 profile image
Mendyjem1 in reply to gogogirl

I have tried to taper off of celexa in the past. I managed to get down to almost half the dose and started to feel pretty anxious. So went back up. I don't disagree with people who choose to manage their depression without medication. But anxiety was somewhat part of my personality and so celexa just helps calm me a bit. I hope to try and eventually taper off in the future. But I am also not against taking it for the rest of my life. Life is short. I want to live as joyful a life as possible. If taking a relatively harmless medication helps me do that, then I'm not opposed

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to Mendyjem1

I know what you mean about personality- although in my case events from the past certainly ramped that up! Anyway, I thank you, and that is good if it adds to the quality of your life.

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to Mendyjem1

That is really great to hear. We will be looking into options for my husband, so I'm glad to know that there are medications that can work and not have egatuve side effects. I wholeheartedly agree - life is short and you have to figure out what works for you as an individual. And I think the main issue is my husband struggles with anxiety like you do. So that's good to know. Thank you!

Mendyjem1 profile image
Mendyjem1 in reply to dawliwalli

Yes there are medications. As much as I'm not trying to advocate for antidepressants, I think a lot of people demonized them. However, I would recommend it as a last resort because getting off of them can be tough. But some people may not choose to get off of them. Ultimately the doctor and your husband would make that decision.

But I wish your family all the best! You sound like such a supportive and caring mother and wife! That is the best thing you can do

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to Mendyjem1

Thank you so much! That sure is nice to hear, I appreciate the encouragement. I wish you all the best as well!

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to Mendyjem1

Thank you so much. That's really great to know. I appreciate your feedback on what's been helpful for you! Hope you are doing well, all the best

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to Mendyjem1

I was told that celexa and lexapro can cause ten pounds of weight gain at least . I have always been a vegan/natural person and I am a shorty besides that- so ten pounds might be like a "fireplug." Anyway, thanks for your help and be well.

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl

Starting a business can be very difficult as you more than know. There are the ups and downs, finances etc. Did he have anxiety before this? You need to take care of yourself and the rest of your family as well , and hopefully he can find a supportive person to talk to preferably a friend or family member who understands. If that does not work- perhaps an appointment to a MD if he's willing. Good luck to you. I have had businesses- and know it's not easy.

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to gogogirl

Yes he has always had anxiety, but has always managed it. Now it's just taken over his life and turned into depression I think. Thank you for your feedback, so helpful.

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to dawliwalli

I know I have a long history of anxiety- although I did not have a label for it until the last six years or so. I hope that you all find your way through this, and get additional support. It's nice to know that you are so committed.

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to dawliwalli

There was a piece on the news tonight - I only saw part of it- and it was mentioned that chronic stress can lead to depression. Apparently, there is some testing for a new drug for depression as well, but of course that is up to a MD>

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to gogogirl

Yes I think that's what's been happening with my husband. He's a a huge amount of stress and anxiety from starting his business for the past few years that's it's turned into depression.

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to dawliwalli

It sounds like you guys work very hard in your business. What type is it that is so stressful? Life must be hard seeing him this way. I hope that you get the help you need, and can take a break as well. I know we all need balance that is for sure.

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl

Would he be open to meditation or even just going for a walk - something that just calms the nerves.

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to gogogirl

We definitely need balance back in our lives! I am big into yoga, just getting back into it. I would love for him to try yoga and meditating. We will see! Thank you for you support.

gogogirl profile image
gogogirl in reply to dawliwalli

That is wonderful. The ancient societies sure must have a lot to teach.

Sailingmom profile image
Sailingmom

Is your husband seeing a Psychiatrist? He should get on meds right away for the depression. There are also anxiety meds he can take on an as needed basis. Keep in mind that the depression meds can take a month to 6 weeks to work, and he may need an increase in dosage or a different med until he finds the right one for him. As for you, your support is huge. Be kind and let him know you are with him through his struggles. It does get better with the right meds. He needs to be persistent with the Dr to ensure he gets what he needs and what is good for his depression. Some antidepressants can cause suicidal ideations at first but will go away. Be patient and tell him to be patient as the meds start working. Good Luck!

dawliwalli profile image
dawliwalli in reply to Sailingmom

Sorry I'm just seeing this. Thank you for your advice. We need to get him into see a psychiatrist. He is really struggling right now. I wish there was more that I could do!

MattyJ71 profile image
MattyJ71

Similar situation with my longtime girlfriend. It can get lonely when it rears it's head...

Nolapaint profile image
Nolapaint

Its rough... I suffer and have seen my husband go through it . I would recommend a therapist!!

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