Advice on how to help someone

[Hilfiger714]

How to go about helping my parents. My fathers anxiety has hit an all time high and he is stressing my mother to no end. Every time i voice my concerns I feel it does more damage. My father has no idea the amount of stress he is putting on my mother. She's gaining weight and just miserable. He doesn't see it and get defensive when you address it. How do I help them? I don't know what to do!

[sweetiepye]

Hi Hilfiger, I'm sorry your family is going through such a painful time, but all families do have experiences like this . It's difficult for children to help parents because parents do seem to resent advice from them. You need to understand this is not your fault or your responsibility. Let them both know you love them and that this is hurting you very much. If you have a family Pastor or a relative you are close to you might ask them to step in. Come on here as often as you like, there will be others with more advice for you. Pam

[Jutta_5]

Hi,

It sounds like we are in the same boat. My dad also has anxiety and my mom is stressing like crazy. In my moms case, it helps to encourage her to do the things she likes so she has a break from my dads crazy 'anxiety fantasies'. For her, those are things like excercise, reading, and even video games. I try to give her time to do these types of things by helping with the housework so she doesn't have to do as much. I have read that some people find it helpful to go out with friends and see movies or socialize. As for my dad we have him going to a psychiatrist and we're trying to find medication that works. we try to support him but honestly we struggle with that since none of us really understand what he's going through. In my family my role seems to be mostly just listening to the separate concerns of each parent and offering support where I can and try to encourage each one to partake in the activities they find enjoyable. I hope it gets better for your family.