*sigh* I've been doing so well lately! I wanna say I don't know what happened but I guess I can trace a few events that led to a crazy binge today.
Firstly.. Its the school holidays. My usual routine is up and down. Days off work mean eating two lighter meals rather than my usual one main meal. So being back at work, not eating all day, I was feeling hungrier than normal!
Secondly I've been losing 2lbs a week consistently recently but then my scales needed new batteries and suddenly added lbs on to my weight! This week I was expected to reach 9st 7lb but the scales are saying 9st 10lbs! So that sucks. I told myself it doesn't matter, that I am on vacation next weekend and was going to put weight on anyways and then have to refocus on weight loss anyways when I get back so it doesn't matter if the scales are already a little higher. But yeah, its drained some of my usual motivation and will power.
Thirdly I was frustrated today as I've been having some problems with my eyes. Sore, watering and pretty bad light sensitivity. Esp in the mornings. I couldn't even look at the TV screen today. I drove to work with sunglasses on but was still tricky. I phoned the doctors but they said I need to see the optician. Phoned the optician but they said they can't fit me in for five days. They suggested going to the eye hospital but I can't take time off work! And as a single mum I don't want to drag the kids to the hospital for hours! Oh, I got drops from the pharmacy few days ago but I swear they gave me wrong ones. I've had these symptoms before and think its allergy related. Usually optrex drops work fast! But pharmacy gave me drops "for bloodshot eyes". Don't think they are right? And not worked.
Anyways to cut this short... Frustrated and finding it hard to see at work today I ended up having apple crumble and cream!
BTW I have managed to get an opticians appointment for tomorrow...
Anyways at home I also pigged out on a box of chocolates my daughter got for her birthday and didn't like. They have been a terrible temptation for weeks and today I was just fed up of seeing them and figured I might as well eat them all so the temptation is gone for good from tomorrow!
I've also been tempted to get a take away but realised deep down I am not hungry and it would be a stupid waste of both calories and money!
So yeah... I've fallen today. And bad!
I promise I will be good tomorrow though! Its just a little scary to realise that really really deep down there still is a little bit of the old me still there! That it could still be easy to go back to old habits. I know am not going to but just proves how much you have to always be aware! Even when you have reached your goal!
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CrimsonMama
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Oh eck CrimsonMama, I really feel for you. That is such a large mixer of events and emotions, that no wonder that you've taken your eye off the ball for a moment.
Don't worry about falling off the wagon for a day... previously, I've taken a chainsaw to my wagon. You can climb straight back up on to yours.
If you haven't already, maybe tell your optician that you think the eye drops are causing problems. Hopefully that might gee them up.
I think you've done really well in posting so quickly. I'm sure you'll be good tomorrow after gathering up your energy and having a good night's sleep. Sleep well and see you tomorrow.
Hahaha! I took my eye off the ball... And it landed on apple crumble and chocolate! Tuttut!
Well its a new day! I am taking the drops to the optician to show them! I have a three hour drive to my vacation next week so I need my eyes sorted by then! *fingers crossed*
Good for you. You definitely need to make sure you're using the right drops.
Sorry you are having a rough time CrimsonMama. What is done has been and gone. So don’t beat yourself up about it. You have already said tomorrow will be back on track. That is the best thing to do. So have a good nights sleep and start again. 😊😊
Heya. Thank you! I guess looking at the positive, in the past falling off the wagon would last for weeks if not months. Now its just for a day! I will still be happier when September rolls around though and my routines are more stable!
Ohh bless you CrimsonMama... You are such an inspiration to so many of us with your amazing journey.
I can completely understand your disappointment this week especially as you've been so consistent in your losses. It's bound to hit you, even when you tell yourself it's just a blip. You're only human, there's going to be times when it falls apart a bit. But you know you'll get yourself sorted, you made a start before the day ended and you'll carry on.
Thank you very kind words! And lol hopefully shows people I am still susceptible to falling off the wagon despite my successes!
Today is going pretty well though. My eyes seem good since my mum gave me some allergy eye drops she had! So annoyed with the pharmacy! But I'm guessing I can't take the other drops back as I've used them? Useless rubbish!
Diet wise I'm firmly back on track and under 100 calories for the day to make up for yesterday!
I'm so looking forward to my trip next week! And THEN looking forward to reaching my maintaining weight goal! Its so close!!
So long as my evil scales behave themselves now lol!
I don't mind if it i started losing 1lb a week. So long as its in the right direction. I am the size I am happy with now and I highly doubt another 4-10lbs is going to make much difference to my overall shape. The bonus of reaching my target is just that I can then start introducing a few more calories. For instance I currently have half a slice of tiger bread for breakfast. Will be so so nice to go back to having a whole slice! And just that will feel like a luxury lol.
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