Being Tested

[SheenaL]

Hey y'all, it's been a few days since I've been able to get on here, but for good reason.. I guess anyway. I started a new job on Monday working 10 hour days and everyone seems okay for the most part except the one person who is training me. It's not a hard job. I've learned how to do it already and that's great but she seems like she is just a gossiping, complaining type of person and I don't want to be around that all day, but have no choice if I stay there. Like I've thought about quitting a few times just bc I can't imagine working with her attitude every day. This brings me to my point: sometimes when I'm at work and see other ppl smoking, bc she is making me so mad, I'm standing there imagining smoking a cigarette. The only reason I don't, every time a want to use a cigarette as a coping mechanism I think about how the problem will still be there whether I smoke or not so I may as well just not smoke and esp. Not let someone like that lady cause me to relapse. Like I understand she has been working there a year, but for her not to even be my boss or manager, but just a co-worker and to just talk to me the way she does is crazy. She changes her attitude to all friendly and helpful when the boss is around though. Sorry yall, I had to vent. I'm coming up on 8 months nicotine free and I'm so happy for that. Hoping Monday is better.

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hi SheenaL

I know the work problems

I worked with thee proper bit,,,, s they drove me mental.i ended up giving my job up but at 50 odd year old was a massive mistake,

should not have let them get me down and out.

you keep kicking 😁

take care 😊

[CocoaXChange Valued Contributor]

Some people are just like that in all aspects of life, fortunately they are the smaller part. The problem with them at work is we are there for such a big part of the day. But try to block her negativity out. Hopefully after a while she will spend less time with you.

Just remember: pins and needles, needles and pins a happy woman is a woman that grins.

youtube.com/watch?v=sdcV3lj...(Not working as expected?)

[Exsmo in reply to CocoaXChange]

This is great Cocoa❗️

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free]

Hey SheenaL , good to hear from you.

You have come so far, achieved so much and got through alot harder life's curve balls in your almost 8 months smoke free journey and we will not let you fall

One thing I have worked on over the last 5 years is to cut negative people out of my life (including family members) as it just sucks the life out of you, how I done this, was to not entertain the negativity, gossiping and let them feed it on to you, this may take a bit of work but worth it to persevere short term.

When you go back to work and the negativity starts, just don't interact with it, switch off and she will soon see that that she can't feed off you, it works, I promise

Keep us updated on how you are getting on....

[Exsmo in reply to RoisinO1]

Agree with Roison on this. Ive had to do it too. Rather hard at first, but so worth it once done. She is so right about not letting them feed off you by listening to it.

Don't feel bad either in the long run you'll be doing her a favor too.

[Nozmo Valued Contributor]

People like that must be so insecure and unsure of themselves. I can't think of any other reason why they should try to keep others down...apart from maybe they're just plain nasty. If you did go back to smoking she would probably use this against you as well - any chink in the armour to exploit! Don't give her the satisfaction.

[SheenaL Valued Contributor]

Thank y'all so much for the encouragement. I'm going to work on what y'all suggested and I'm gonna keep on with this job for a bit longer. I sure hope things get better bc today my family keeps asking if I'm okay, that I look sad. I am angry, sad and sleepy all rolled together today. Life must go on.. I'll keep you posted on what the outcome is this upcoming week.

[Jared01 Valued Contributor in reply to SheenaL]

Please don't let one person cause you to give up a job, the advice above should sort this for you and remember you will meet negative people in every job and all walks of life, its learning how to not entertain them.....

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free]

How did you get on today SheenaL ?

[Exsmo]

Ooo i feel for you. Am not working right now & rather fear that scenario on return to a new job.

Am very proud of you seeing a smoke will make NOTHING better and would be so disappointing to give up 8months smober.

As Thinlizzy always says keep kicking. Maybe literally make a kick movement as tho you're kicking her nonsense away...

That may sound weird but i think we have a body memory thing going on. Example Action girl is stressing you, past reaction=smoke for false sense of calm (that was really only getting a fix & calming withdrawal of nicotine)

Had a relationship go sour that I couldn't get out of my head. A girlfriend said shake it out of your head. I literally had to shake my head. It worked!

This makes me wonder if we ex smokers arent all a bit kinesthetic like that.

[SheenaL Valued Contributor]

Thank you all for your words of encouragement! I worked up the courage to talk to the owner and assistant manager and they had expressed how displeased they had been with her lately and to not quit because of her. They talked to her while I was at lunch and when I returned, she was nice and didn't stand over me.

They told me they asked her to back off of me and let me do my job. All was well after I spoke to them and I'm still smoke free Thank you all for caring!

[RoisinO1 Administrator 3 Years Smoke Free in reply to SheenaL]

Good to read SheenaL