Relapsed after 1 year +

Firstly hello, I've just joined.

Last Saturday night I started smoking again on a night out after a lot of drink. I'd been quit since January 2015 and had a little boy four months ago. I was annoyed at myself but the monster was stirring so I've been using my husband's ecig but on Tuesday I had a stressful day with the baby crying so I gave in and smoked. The same happened today. I bought nicotine lozenges today as they helped me quit last time but I still smoked.

Feel like I'm sliding back into the trap but don't want!!!

14 Replies

  • A big hello from me Tooty, and welcome, I feel a mirror image, as indeed I did exactly the same, I can indeed see how oh so difficult a situation your in.  But with the brilliant  news, that is you have choice, that choice is yours, please please, if you can revert your mind back to quitting prior to your relapse, it may help you realise just how  far you have come, it's a hiccup, that I guess just happened, as these things do!!!!  But you can focus, find inner strength to push on with your quit.

    For to day please  keep posting, get your arsenal of weapons ready, for getting back on track tomorrow,  your stronger than you think, 

    With such wonderful people here, you've hit the jackpot, in knowing we all have the same goal, to be nicotine free.

    You have done a amazing job, so let's just keep going.

    Post as you want, great advice here

  • Thank you

  • Huge welcome Tootsy84, you have made great decisions in the last 40 minutes - you put your hand up that you need help, you have come on this forum and finally you know what you have to do - get back on the horse now....

    You need to bite the bullet now, you're well on your way but may not realize it.  Your beautiful 4 month old son should do this for you.

    I look forward to seeing you back on track and reading your progress, wishing you success and strength...

  • Thank you

  • Hi Tootsy, welcome to the forum. How is it going today? have you smoked anymore? You obviously need to get back into the quit as soon as possible as the longer you leave it the harder it will be.

    One thing to realise (as I'm sure you already have) is that it's going to be a very different quit compared to the last time. You have your son now and he is going to add to the stress, wonderful though I'm sure he is! I've got two kids, 9 and 14, but I remember VERY well the stress of dealing with a crying baby.

    The good thing is, he will keep you very busy and that's an important thing to help you get through your quit.

    How are you going to do it? Are you going to use NRT?

    Sorry, lots of questions.

    I hope we can help. Post whenever you need to, whether you're feeling good or bad.

  • Welcome Tootsy. You can do this - keep strong

  • Hi Tootsy,

    Well done for coming on the forum, I hope your last couple of days have been a bit easier. I have been where you are twice before, quit for over a year and then started smoking again. In my case it wasn't really stress, it was the illusion that I had conquered the nicotine monster and therefore just an occasional smoke was ok, as a reward. Obviously this was not ok and within a few weeks I was back from a couple a day to my standard 15 a day and feeling even more addicted than previously.

     I can't emplore you more than to say please please please just gather every ounce of strength you have and stop again right now before it really takes hold. The stress of family life will still be there, smoker or not, cigarettes will make it worse not easier, especially the guilt I think you're bound to feel. I also found it so much harder to get back to the point of wanting to quit again, it took me a year of smoking to be ready again, one because I thought I loved smoking (I was so addicted) and two because I built up in my mind how hard the quit was last time. In reality it wasn't hard. 

    I really hope you decide to do this sooner rather than later so you can enjoy the summer with your new baby smoke free and can save all that money for fun family time!

    Good luck and best wishes! Toni x

  • Thanks everyone for your replies. Today I've been using the ecig I haven't smoked any real cigs as i broke the rest of them up last night. I'm going to try and just use the lozengers but I feel bad that I'm back on nrt again but if it keeps me from smoking that's all the matters right??

  • Yeah, of course it can wean yourself off the nrt once you've settled down.

    Well done on destroying the cigs!

    Keep posting 

  • Great to read Tootsy, you are back on the horse!   Well done!    Just take it one day at time for the next week or so then you can think about coming off the as often as you need to,,,,

  • You use whatever it takes to keep you off smoking.  I use an ecig and whilst I would have preferred not to use any nrt I feel sure I would not have lasted long. You have done it before you can do it again good luck

  • Well done! Try and keep to the lozenges rather than the ecig if you can, I'm still using mine after 7 weeks and wish I hadn't started. Smoking is probably not a part of your routine yet as you only just relapsed so it should be easier to just forget about it all together very soon :)

  • Yeah I'm thinking same. I feel like the ecig isnt a good choice for me so I'm sticking to the lozengers. 

  • Wow tootsy, I don't know what to say. My feelings on reading your post is I feel totally guttered. I'm at day 19 today and listen to all these people telling me to keep going, it gets easier, the cravings get less and you think about it less as time goes on. Now I read this and feel so insecure and wondering if these cravings and habits ever die. I'm so sorry and wish I could be like the others and offer you support but I can't I'm so confused . I suppose human nature makes us think about ourselves first. I do hope you give up again. Babies from non smoking homes smell much better. Good luck 

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