Trapped in my own private hell

[Chase888]

I am so anxious.

Been awake since 5am and it's now 2pm and I have had a bad year. Lockdown, lost my voluntary job

Huge problem for about 5months with a doctor. I phoned everyone for advice and it did work out because I was 💯 correct.

SHE (the doctor) phoned me twice to apologise because I was 💯 correct and she was worried about her job.

But it made me ill and I could only tell the professionals who helped me a lot and phoned HER.

My friend has cancer and I wasn't there for him. I am trying now and took him food and did shopping.

I'm waiting for specialist dental treatment. One good thing is I don't have much of an appetite.

The other day in the early hours I came to life and went to the 24hour supermarket and then met the cat who lives near me. I had cat treats on me and I was talking to him. 4.30am LOL and a man called out the window shut up and I really laughed cos I had it all on video.

Now, I've crashed again.

I'm all alone, no family and people I loved have all died on me. I feel like a jinx.