Counselling, no further forward

[Diamonddaisy]

Well have had my sessions.

Not sure where I'm going now.

It's just a repeat of other sessions I've had over the years. Even during these I've had setbacks

Difficult divorce still going on (he's now had a baby with my now ex friends daughter (21yrs younger than him) this has caused my daughter to disown him.

My physical health had declined, hernia, gall stones and kidney issues

I'm now suffering from severe fatigue, I mean REALLY SEVERE so waiting for blood tests to find out why .

I'm struggling with work as it's physical

My disabled daughter is ill

My 88 Yr old mum is be innubg harder to care for

So..... Self diagnosed that depression is my normal

New med of ecitalopram does nothing at all for my and am blooming fed up of taking meds. Will continue with that and my anticoagulant but done in, my life is a horrible depressing struggle.

Don't know what else to say.

Thanks for listening

[Hidden]

How long have you been on this drug, are you also taking any other medications ? Allow about five weeks for the drug to work.

You are over the five concerns that cause stress and anxiety, you are also depressed and I can understand your reasons.

Some of your concerns need just to play out, over time they will clear, it would seem

I have several chronic disabilities and one suggestion and treatment they are trying with me is various mineral and vit deficiencies. I was placed on D3, most people lack sunlight this can cause many problems. I was also places on two weeks injections of B12, in twelve weeks time I will be having an injection. This will now be part of my treatment plan. You can find explanations of these two medications on the internet.

The problem is the dust has hit the fan here and you are feeling the strain, you need to be able to step back and look at things in a different way. Sometimes if possible delegate in some way and that may help. Can you arrange for the Social Service or Health team to call on your Mother or other family members, that can help you gain, ME TIME. where you can take regular breaks. Age Concern has in some areas Day Centres as do other Organisations that can support you Mam exist in your area.

Your Disabled Daughter, what is the situation there, is She at Home or Hospital ?

BOB

[Diamonddaisy in reply to Hidden]

Thankyou for your reply. I'm on the third moth taking ecitalopram, I also have apixaban a for afib. Hypermobile ehlers-danlos syndrome and osteoarthritis.

My daughter is only 17 and so still at home my son 16 still at school with eating and sensory stuff going on

Mum absolutely refused any care. I've tried a number of times but it soon ends.

Don't want her to go into care, I used to work in that area and I've seen how bad a lot of them are

I have 2 sisters who have walked away, one as she stole money 10's of thousands from my parents and the other reported me for abusing my mum financially, was investigated and found to be malicious, she then physically assaulted my disabled daughter who also has hypermobile ehlers-danlos syndrome and dislocated my daughters shoulder. Police didn't charge her and she is now out of the scene

I'm just exhausted both physically and mentally and can't see this changing any time soon

[Hidden in reply to Diamonddaisy]

Over the years I have had to look after various Relatives as and when they got older, before Death. Also I have had to sort out with the assistance from Lawyers the complications of dealing with interstate, (no will) I have had my Father and Aunt Dementia and have had to deal with the Health Service, Social Services and Nursing homes so I do understand the situation you find yourself in.

As MAS explains you need regular breaks from your Mam, this does not follow your Mother would need to go into a home. It may be possible to arrange some day care where she would be taken into a day centre where she would meet other people, have lunch and possibly play games, bingo or singalongs. This can break her day and keep the brain more active. Your GP will be able to advise. The other thing you could try in the home may be having someone come in during the day and help with housework and give limited companionship. This will afford you time to attend to your own life concerns. Hopefully with this pathway you can take on other concerns in your life, for example your daughter.

I would strongly advise you talk to your Mothers Doctor, a double appointment can be made and if you make a list of what you wish to talk about this will assist the GP to work out the needs of your Mam.

With your Health concerns and that of your daughter it is important you are there for Her, again discuss your needs with your GP and explain all your concerns and worry.

It is important you can focus on your needs, as mentioned below you are going through regular tests. It is important you consider your options with assistance as many of your worries and concerns can amplify your health worries, this is all counter productive especially when you are unable to muster support from your siblings etc.

There are various types of assistance you can muster with support of your health professionals

For sleep try relaxation technique MINDFULNESS, try not having supper to late in the evening, eat about three hours before bed this will help with digestion..

Your GP should be able to arrange some therapy, they will help you with various tools to control your stress and anxiety. They can also assist with Mindfulness.

If you have the need to try this technique, there are books on Amazon, they cost about seven or eight pounds to purchase.

Sometimes if you are feeling tired etc your GP may suggest Vit D3 and Vit B12.

The latter can be given by mouth although generally given by injection, six injections over two weeks, D3 is given by mouth for an initial period of six weeks.

every other day

BOB

[Diamonddaisy in reply to Hidden]

Thankyou. Mums medication review is due and I'll look into discussing matters further after that mum is very strong willed and so far has refused all suggestions but will try again

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi Diamonddaisy and thank you for your post. I am sorry to hear things are so difficult for you. Bob has posted some really helpful advice. When your health issues are addressed you will begin to feel better. Taking regular breaks for relaxation will also help as there is so much for you to deal with at present. It may also help you to speak to your doctor about how you are feeling. Please have a look at the pinned post section on the screen for other useful information [also, AGE UK's website address is--- ageuk.org.uk/]. Please stay in touch on this caring forum and let us know how you are doing. Are any other members able to help Diamonddaisy, please? Thank you and best wishes.

[Diamonddaisy in reply to MAS_Nurse]

Thanks I've replied with more information above. I'm having loads of bloodtests right now as I paid for a sensitivity test which I've found I have lots of allergies including gluten so having celiac test and looking for deficiencies too as vits and minerals showed up too

I tend not to sleep managing 4hrs if I'm lucky but just lately I've gone the other way, tired and exhausted constantly and loosing my focus

Sometimes with I could switch all the hard stuff off and find good but I've been like this since early teens, I have more bad luck and problems and don't remember happy times.

I'm 61 in a few days time and still can't see a happy future. Don't even expect anyone to remember either

[MAS_Nurse in reply to Diamonddaisy]

Hi Diamonddaisy, I hope things will improve for you soon. Have you contacted EHLERS-DANLOS-SUPPORT-UK? This organisation is able to provide support and has support groups in many regions in the UK.

https;//ehlers-danlos.org/what-is-eds/

I hope this is helpful to you. Thank you and best wishes.

[Diamonddaisy in reply to MAS_Nurse]

I'm on their fb groups so I'm not alone with this especially for my daughter who is far worse than I have ever been. There are no actual groups near where I live. I've dropped off reading the posts lately. I'm just to tired of the struggles. I'm particular this last year as since she became 16 there spears to be a gap in NHS care as she's discharged from paediatrics but adult services are 18. Contacted my mp about this and he's looking into it but I've just come to a stop with everything as far as fighting for her and myself. In my head I'm just saying to myself that I'm done with everything, I'm tired of it all and wonder why my whole life has been a fight to find a day without drama or stree or struggles. Would love to be happy.