past messed up my future

[antwanya]

im 28 years old i was abusied as a kid. i started drugs to cover my pain. guys played games and now i found a good man i stoped using and my nightmares of my past hunts me witch he cant deal with helping my depression so he broke up with me im so hurt i feel bad alone and sucidal.

[monicrt80]

Hello, first I want to congratulate you for stopping the self medication! I've been in your situation before and know how hard it is to struggle through withdrawals and the nightmares from our past lives. Second, in my opinion that guy was not right for you. Maybe think of this as a lesson, a lesson which helped you reach Step 1 for yourself (getting sober). In my eyes this is more than fantabulous (fantastic & fabulous a word my children and I made up) and you're doing great!

I guess what I really want to say is, you should always be the priority, regardless of any relationship. Take care of yourself 1st and try to be happy with who you are, depressed, anxiety, etc. It's okay to feel that way and there people around the world with similar trials and tribulations. I hope this message helps even if it's just a little, I know this is extremely long but you're not alone. I'll be here for a while if you'd like to chat.

[antwanya in reply to monicrt80]

thank you very much it does make me feel better to know im not alone in this world and im not crazy.

[MAS_Nurse]

Hi antwanya and welcome to the forum. Monicrt80 has given some very helpful advice. Do take care of yourself. You are not alone. Please keep posting on this caring forum and other members will be along to offer their support. You are doing so well. Have you received any counselling to help you? You may also like to speak to your GP who may be able to arrange some counselling.

isurvive.org/ has forums for people in the UK and outside of the UK

napac.org.uk/other_support/

These are helpful websites. Thank you and best wishes.

[reinagrace]

Hi antwanya i've been in your situation where a guy broke up with me bc he couldn't deal with my issues , and i did try to kill myself, this was 12 years ago. i also had a traumatic childhood and lifelong severe depression/anxiety-- so i just want you to know i understand and pray for you, that the pain heals. it's a hard lesson in life, but relationships usually don't work when one or both have a lot of unresolved issues. i went thru a lot of counseling to dig deep , to learn to act in more mature healthier ways, with my emotions. hopefully if i ever have a relationship again, i will be better able to handle it and not drive the guy away. also, i was attracted to and dated dysfunctional men, another pattern i've learned to stop. you say this was a "good guy", but who knows, if you'd gotten to know him more deeply, he might have turned out to have some dysfunction also. i hope you can form good friendships in which you can talk about your hurts and heal them, and/or a support group and compassionate therapist. Blessings

[antwanya]

Thank u the advice gave me hope