Still feeling low

[Nicolaclare01]

Hi all,

I made a post on here a few weeks ago about feeling down about work, right I'll admit, things have got a little better, in fact the person which triggers my down spells has been on leave and I've managed to keep up with all my work.

But he comes back today and I asked him for a little help as I had to do a favour for someone which I started on Friday, but he wouldn't help, he did the printing, which is great, but he kept piling them on me which puts me under pressure. I'm working my complete hardest and now I'm sat at home thinking that I'm not good enough and feeling like I'm having a mini breakdown.

Sick of feeling like this!

[Hidden]

Have you got a boss you can talk to about him?

[Nicolaclare01]

I do, but most days they show no interest and that they keep telling me that I have to sort it out myself, as for the person I have to deal with, he can be really difficult and he can put someone down nearly reducing them to tears.

[Hidden in reply to Nicolaclare01]

There has to be a way that you can put in an official complaint.

[Nicolaclare01 in reply to Hidden]

There's no point, they let him get away with all sorts, even referring to the team as idiots.

[Hidden in reply to Nicolaclare01]

Is he a boss?

[Nicolaclare01 in reply to Hidden]

No, he's the same grade as me.

[Hidden in reply to Nicolaclare01]

Well there has to be something that can be done.

Keep complaining until someone does something about him?

[Nicolaclare01 in reply to Hidden]

I will, but I'm also going to see if there are any other roles within the department.

[Hidden in reply to Nicolaclare01]

Yes go for it, I hope you can get it sorted so you can be happy at your work.

[needtobehappy in reply to Nicolaclare01]

The favour you were doing someone? Did it need to be done or were you piling more pressure on yourself in which maybe practicing some assertiveness and saying no my workload is to great. As for your bosses I would definitely speak to them again and make it clear this man is making you feel uncomfortable at work and is clearly unacceptable if he is reducing people to tears and that isn't conducive with a good business. Staff are their business at the end of it all and you need to be treated with respect. Allowing your workplace to cause such pain in your life will allow it to flow into all other aspects of your life! Can you look for a new position? Possibly raise a tribunal if your employer doesn't help? Thinking of you can feel so awful when your loaded with so much stress and you don't know which way to turn.

[Nicolaclare01 in reply to needtobehappy]

Last week I was fine, as I kept up with the timekeeping and didn't have that person interfering, the favour I was doing is for a girl who is a one man team, basically like me. So I have to find time to do that.

[Hidden]

Hi, just wanted to say you are not alone, this happens a lot, but most people are not strong enough to talk about it. Its definitely not your fault. Hope you can stay with the job, I left a well paid job due to similar pressure/bullying (20 years ago), still wish it hadn't ended that way. Sometimes life is unfair, hope things soon improve for you. My survival mantra nowadays is "Everything is temporary, it will pass".

[Hidden]

Hiya Nicola, I was a line manager for most of my career and my advice would be:

1. Bullying is inappropriate and unnacceptable and must be challenged, otherwise it will just continue/get worse.

2. Put your complaint in writing/e-mail with as much detail as possible, citing examples with dates if possible, and submit it to your line manager and ask for a response. Your company should have a 'dignity at work' policy, which you should refer to.

3. If your line manager refuses to act, escalate your complaint to his line manager and your HR/Personnel Manager.

4. If you have a Union, get them involved.

Clearly, it's your decision and I know challenging inappropriate behaviour is not easy, but I think being on the receiving end of bullying is far worse. Other employees no doubt will feel the same as you - maybe they would be prepared to stand with you and submit a joint/collective complaint ? (strength in numbers). Take care,

[Nicolaclare01 in reply to Hidden]

Other people have been feeling pressure, especially due to one person who keeps collapsing and another left the job. I don't want to end up like them, but I feel like it's going that way. I have told my line manager and supervisor numerous times about this person picking on me and constantly criticising me, but nothing is being done about it.

The problem is, I love what I do, but I don't want to feel like rubbish when I come home from work every night.