Log in
Mental Health Support
20,963 members12,727 posts

I’m hated by everyone. I’m so ugly that it's impossible to make friends. I feel so depressed, and I just want to go away. What do I do?

Honestly i dont know what to do anymore. Im 19 and ever since iv been in school iv always been bullied and looked down upon because of the way i look.I have never had friends and cant make any because i have asperger's syndrome and im dyslexic which makes everything hard.I cant even go out because people stare and recognise im different and and give me dirty looks alout of the time because i stand out wherever i go because im objectivity ugly.

Its not fair i was born with so many disadvantages compared to most people. Im never going to have a normal life.If i died tomorrow nobody would care.

12 Replies

Hi mate, another 19 year old here! I disagree with the fact that if you died tomorrow people wouldn't care.. what about your family? Do you think they would not care?

Lets be honest, some people are ****s and you don't need them in your life!

A work friend of mine also has Aspergers and hands down he is one of the most caring person I have ever met. Having Aspergers and Dyslexia is not a disadvantage and don't let any other person tell you otherwise!

If you don't mind me asking, are you working now or still in school?

Also have you seen a GP or spoken to anyone about how you're currently feeling?


Do not be discouraged. God has a plan for you. Something bigger, something great! He would never give you challenges more than you could bear. He is watching you. Acknowledge his presence. Pray and persevere. Keep pushing forward. Don't feel alone. Somewhere around the world, someone is suffering the same thing. Be inspired! Be brave! Be an example to others who gave up and/or giving up! Be a leader, be a hero, not only to others but even to yourself! Each one of us in this world has a purpose, and believe me my friend when I say this, you aren't born to be bullied and let down. Be happy and do whatever it takes. For once forget about everything else. Focus on yourself. Focus on your goals. Find your purpose!!

1 like

Hi Tomos,

I also have Asperger's but I'm (quite) a bit older than you. When I was your age I was exactly where you are now, I was bullied and felt that everyone was staring at me all the time - it got to the point where I couldn't leave the house and I dropped out of school entirely. This was not a good thing to do.

The problem you have is very low self-esteem, so you feel inferior to other people and you think you stand out. You also think people can tell that you are 'different' just by looking at you, I know because I used to feel like this. These are all negative thoughts with no basis in reality.

Try to think differently about yourself. People with Asperger's tend to have a higher intelligence than average, and often have other talents, insights and abilities that neuro-typical people do not possess. Yes, Asperger's can disadvantage you socially but that's not the whole story - there are plenty of people who had the condition and did OK (Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, Albert Einstein to name a few...) So stop being so hard on yourself, and just ignore anyone who doesn't understand you. If you are not already having any counselling or support with Asperger's, you need to get some, you can't be expected to deal with all this by yourself.

As for the people who picked on you, remember that bullying isn't just childish behaviour, it's like any form of bigotry - anyone who does it is just scum. They really are inferior people.

Stay strong.



Great quote about people with Aspergers having a higher intelligence than most. I could not agree more. As I mentioned in my post I have a work mate with Aspergers and when we went through advanced training things that was taking myself and the rest of the class a week to learn he'd come back in about 2 days with everything completed!

TomosWatts I really hope you read RoboMark's comments!


I'd like to be friends with you.


Please don't be so hard on yourself, I'm now 57 yrs young and I convinced myself of the same thing at about the same age as you are now....

The best thing I ever heard I think is something my father said to me years n years ago....

"At anytime in your life you will only be able to count your real true friends on ONE hand" and to be honest with you that has been soooooo true!!! In fact I would say that it has never been any higher than THREE😲😄, even now I can say that I have a lot of acquaintances BUT only three that I know I could call on at any time for anything....

I have had some real trash scary times but being able to write exactly how I feel and know that NO ONE here will ever judge me has made me feel better than I have for ages... Please don't be worried about being disliked or hated by anyone here as I'm certain that all we would like to do is support you through anything you may face. I'm certain that whatever you face or go through someone here will be able to help you..

Take care 😉



Hello, I hope you are feeling a bit stronger today. My sister has Asperger's and was only formally diagnosed when she was 18. Before that we just thought she was really shy and a bit socially awkward. I am two years younger than her and my brother is two years younger than me. She is 34 now. Throughout school she was bullied terribly and I am sad to say I wasn't much help to her. She would come and hang out with me and my friends but still found it hard in class as girls can be really spiteful and bitchy. It wasn't until she left school that she was formally diagnosed. Since then she has been to a few different places to try and help, one of which was a college in Gloucestershire called Ruskin Mill. This helped her a lot with her self esteem. She now lives in our local town. She has a couple of good mates who she pals around with and we get together as a family once or twice a week. What I am trying to say is that when I was younger I was focused on myself and what I wanted from life. Her having different interests from me meant I had very little time for her. I was too busy playing the popularity game. It is only as I have got older and matured that you start to see people for who they really are and not just how popular or cool they are. We have a good relationship now and although its hard for us to understand each other sometimes I know that she is really valuable in my life and I love her so much. Basically what I am trying to say in a very round about way is I know its tough now but you are only 19 and those around you are still very self centered and immature. Give them and yourself time to grow into the people they truly are. To realize that life is not a popularity contest. It is going to be tough but I promise people are generally full of love, compassion and friendship. You will not be as different or ugly as you feel, it is your mind playing tricks on you due to low self esteem. I suffer from depression and when I am having my dark periods I also feel like I am standing out and seriously ugly. That everyone is looking at me and talking about me. It isn't true. You are a beautiful person. Please stay strong and when you are feeling alone remember we are all here for you and things will get better.

Take care xxx

1 like

I don't know how helpful this will be, but I'll share it with you because it's such a positive successful story. About 15 years ago I had a kindergarten student named Sam. I was his art teacher and at that time aspergers hadn't been diagnosed yet. He and his family were having a very hard time getting help for him through the school. Most of his teachers thought it was a behavior problem, also he was so smart he would finish ahead of the class and get in trouble trying to amuse himself. When he was in art he colored everything brown. The paper and what ever was on it. I encouraged him to try different colors,but never insisted. By the end of the year he was using all colors. while all this was going on it occurred to me that Sam's world was brown and his Mother cried when I told her and she asked me to write a letter to his shrink.He was taken out of school and home schooled. He finished high school 3 yrs. early. He joined clubs with others who have aspergers , he goes to concerts, and plays . raises prized chickens. He is living a wonderful life. The reason I'm telling you this is conventional thinking doesn't always work. Sometimes you have to find your own way.I have one more message for you. Have you ever had this experience, I have several times and this is it. I will meet someone and think they are unusual looking, maybe unpleasant to look at, but then something happens as I get to know them and I start to see beauty in their face. I can't believe I ever thought they weren't wonderful. It has to do with skin tone and bone structure. Really there is so much there. I could never think someone I like is ugly. You don't feel ugly to me. Not every one will take the time to get to know you, others will. Stay away from people who are unpleasant to you, Pam

1 like

Hiya . I don't know much about Asperger but I'm sorry you were bullied. I was at school and it is horrid ! You don't deserve it . I'm sure you aren't ugly . These people are scum and it isn't a refection on you .


Stop lying to yourself. You are just as worthy as the next person.


My cousin has aspegers syndrome and he is very intelligent, and kind. I can't talk for him but I suffer from depression and I know what you mean with thinking people think your different I always think that people are looking at me and thinking I'm weird but in reality it's all in my mind. No person is ugly I bet you have lots of lovely qualities, beauty is from within in my eyes . It's insecurity that makes us feel ugly . I alway think I'm a horrible person even though people say how nice I am. It's like I have a little man sat on my shoulder saying all these negative thing's like people hate me people think I'm horrible and so on. I hope you find peace just remember your not alone with your thoughts.


I know how you feel I am ugly no boyfriend and seen as the family disappointment it is hard I struggle with it but stil try to get up and keep going I wish I was 'nt here but think of my child and how it would effect him. Life is hard but you just keep going


You may also like...