Feeling really down

Hi This is the first time I have written on anything like this but am feeling pretty low at the moment. I have suffered from depression, anxiety on and off for a number of years, have tried most antidepressants, at the moment on Mirtazapine 15mg. I have a fear of dentists but plucked up courage to go the dentist this for check up and was told the next day that I will need a 1 hour appointment for treatment, after being told this over the phone anxiety took over and my insides were in knots and felt so really panicked, then depression took over and I haven't been out of the house since, I live alone and feel I am alone in the world although I have family I could turn to but don't, so I stay in alone feeling what is the point of getting up every day just to be on my own at home, I don't go out I don't speak to anyone because I feel so down. I also have been diagnosed with diverticular disease and I get stomach pain almost every day with urgency in finding a toilet, which is just another obstacle in me going out. I am 64, divorced after 33 years, and my recent relationship has just finished after 15 years - mainly due to my health issues. All in all I am feeling really low and cant see things getting any better.

5 Replies

  • Hi there and welcome, sorry your feeling down and stuck at the moment. I live alone too so I can empathise with you. Have you been back to your GP to see what they thinks. U fortunately Depression has to ne manages and we have to start to help ourselves, even though we feel like staying in bed all day. I have been there too.

    Make a plan and try and aim to go one thing for yourself each day, could be a simple thing, a nice bath, a small walk to a cafe, you won't feel like doing it, but it will get easier. You are the only one who can change how things are.

    This Forum is a great support, but we have to do a lot of hard work too.

    Don't be downhearted as you are not alone and there are one t of things you can do, join something Ron just start getting out and about.


  • Hello Rosa, things have changed a bit in dentistry and I can't remember the last time a dentist caused me any pain, A long term relationship breaking up is a lot more traumatic but you'll find time will work its healing magic there.

    Depression and anxiety are a bigger problem . Mirtazapine at 15mg is quite a low dose and I would make an appt. at your GP to say that you're still suffering and could your meds be either changed or increased. Anxiety I don't know so much about but I believe it can be greatly decreased with various self help techniques and your local library will probably have quite a few books on it. Your GP may also know of a local course that would help and you might well meet people with similar problems who would welcome a new friend.

    I don't know much about diverticular disease but would only say that a surprisingly high percentage of the over sixties live with some physical problem , a good example being most of we older guys have to find toilets pretty regularly due to prostate problems.

    You'll probably find all this too glowing a picture of your future but if you start tackling some of the problems you can tackle , things hopefully will seem much brighter to you as well. Feeling helpless and that one's problems can't be solved tends to corrode the soul. Taking some actions about some of the problems makes all the others seem much smaller.


  • Some sound advice given to you Rosa09 from Photogeek and Olderal

  • Hello Rosa, I am sorry to hear that you are having such a hard time at the moment, both with your physical and mental health. Never underestimate the interplay between the two. Olderal is bang on the button suggesting that you go back to your GP. Your dose may need tweeking especially in view of your recent break up. When you are there explain about the dental appointment and ask for some Diazepam to help you through the appointment. I hate the dentist and have real problems lying on my back with my mouth open. Why is it that dentists ask you questions when you have half a ton of dental implements in your gob? My GP wrote my dentist a letter explaining how difficult I found dental appointments and the dentist was great, took their time, explained what they were doing, stopped when I waved my hand and put the chair up, it was great, I now go for my 6 month check ups no problem and with no need for Diazepam. Maybe your GP could do the same? If you do get prescribed some Diazepam, make sure that someone else drives you to and from the appointment. If your GP is reluctant to prescribe Diazepam, speak to your dentist, they can prescribe it too.

    As for feeling down, I know you have physical health issues, but I am wondering if you are able to go out even for a 10min walk. The blossom on the trees is amazing at the moment, and all the trees are just beginning to come into leaf, and the birds are yelling their little heads off. See if you can walk to a nearby bench and sit down for five mins and really focus on what is around you, try to ignore the nagging voice of depression that will tell you all sorts of rubbish just to get and keep your attention. Sometimes I will just sit and look at the sky and the clouds passing by, only for 5 mins, but it really calms me down.

    I hope this helps, I am glad you have found this site, we are a friendly and supportive bunch of people, who are all walking our own journeys with mental illness, but we have found that it is a lot less confusing and scary when we get together and support each other. Welcome!

    Take care,


  • Hi, Thank you all for your kind comments, its good to know that Im not alone with these feelings and problems and will try to take on board some of your suggestions.

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