depression feeling sp down

[dontknow467]

Hello there I always feel down every single day I don't even hardly go out now and im always feeling bad everytime and I don't talk to my family members about anything abd I finished with all my cuzzys I don't tall to them anymore I keep my self to my self I feel wasted abd guilty inside and I can't go to sleep in the night u can't beat properly thoughts r running mad in my head u judt feel like mad I don't cry or anything even thought I want to so bad but u cant whats wrong with me? no one supports me but I support everywhere people are priks these days they use you and then when you need them their not there

I seen 3 psychologist in 1 year but nothing has happened yet as no medication has be subscribed to me yet

what am I going through??? because day by day im getting mad and mad 😢😢😢😢😢😢 please help me plesseeeee

[Kjb1980]

Hey sorry to hear your feeling down - unfortunately people aren't always there when you need them but you should try and speak to your family as I'm sure they would want to help and know how your feeling. Suffering in silence is the worse so it's good that you've come to talk on this site. If your psychologists haven't prescribed meds maybe it's worth going back to your GP because medication alongside some counselling could benefit you. Has anything changed or happened for you to feel this way ? Any triggers ? X

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

All this shit depression abd feeling down started in 2014 during in college days I always used to go to collehe with a fucked up mind and mindset abd with a hot head abd I thought oh its normal and ppl used to look at me always and I was wtf y are they staring at me for and I thought oh its nothing im gonna get better but guess wah it's gone bad and worse and worse then I stsrted seeing a lpw psychologist who had a fee degrees thrn she moved me up to another psychologist which as more degree's with ocd and more important stuff to do and then she moved me up to another psychologist who is a proper psychologist who deals with mental heath and you know stuff like that so I dunno whats going on I just feel like winning the lottery so many millions abd jist build my own house mansion and do what I love but no im nothing winning nothing at all everyone looks down on me and I feel like running thrm over them mothetfuckers who don't know what family is. If you knocked their door they don't even open it and if they open it then don't let u inside wtf whst family is that? wah cuzzy bro us that? that aint family? that's worser thsn shit so I locked thst prik off abd I locked off everyone who u know or talk to abd I stay and chill on my own

I don't believe in love or marriages because is pure bullshit it's funny how one girl can cone into my life and fuck it up so bad that it left me lost and no one has ever stood up to help me no one at all what are these ppl? are then even fukin humans? fuck love fuck wifey shit and fuck bitches end off no girl can ever make u happy end off.

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

Kelly I have too many triggers 😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢😢 xx

[Kjb1980 in reply to dontknow467]

Ummmmm I see , was it the girl ? Do you feel bitter and angry at her and everyone around you? X

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

I dont know what bitter is but I feel very very upset and depressed and angry as well because out of everyone she hurted me? I'm a good lad not a bad person who after what she done to me I changed fully charged for the best x

im depressed everyday so thats a start

my heads all over the place abd when I do things I dunno wah im doing

I don't knlw who to talk to or who to trust cuz everyone's a fake ass bitch these days

trust no one xxxx

[Kjb1980 in reply to dontknow467]

Ah I know that feeling ! You think you know someone and they let you down , I went through that over Xmas , stopped eating , couldn't remember doing anything and went from hurt to anger and round and round with all those emotions. If you've changed for the better then that's her loss , but at the same time don't change who you are for anyone. You sound like your a bit depressed but also very angry and I would say a lot is hurting you x

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

yep I been eating so much in the past few days now and I am depressed not a bit depressed I am depressed 😢😢😢 😢

I have changed a lot but I changed for who I really am not wbat im really not

yesss it's so very hurting but idc one day im gonna hurt pll more abd more abd worser 😂

[Kjb1980 in reply to dontknow467]

Have you spoke to your doctor? You sound like your low, angry , hurt and frustrated. Don't seek revenge the best come back is success in yourself. Focus on you for now no one else get rid of that anger that's raging inside. You will find love and happiness though your seeing no light at the end of the tunnel right now but it will come. You need to get some help and support are you still seeing your psych?x

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

yh I have seen my doctor abd things r moving foward slowly but im so tired 😢😢😢😢😢😢 im gonna give up sooner or later abd trust me u dont know how I feel 😂😂😂😂

fuck love happiness all I care about is success 👌

I try to work on my passion but I can't because my depression is inside me im struggling like shall I kill my self? because crying and hurting my self is nlt enough for anyone to see that im actually hurt

[Kjb1980 in reply to dontknow467]

Ohhhh shit that's bad bad. what's your passion? X

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

I have a few passions but im not gonna message it on here as this post is public but ill private message you and tell you x

[Kjb1980 in reply to dontknow467]

Ok x

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

cool message me privately x

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

Yes it was that bitch that fukin girl because of her I can't and won't lobe another girl every again I don't believe in love is its bullshit pure bullshit

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

I dont like everyone in fact I hate everyone around me because I feel like their against me and ppl who r against me are gonna get punched in the face from me 😂

[Kjb1980]

Yep she's your problem by sound of it and has obviously caused you immense hurt. So your angry at her and the world. Not everyone is like that don't give yourself to easily and have your guard up a little. Don't let the hurt and angry get to the point where you'll never let anyone in. You need time to heal. I've kept myself to myself since Xmas to learn from my last relationship and heal and until I'm ready I'll do that and I feel a lot better. Unfortunately we get tested and feel like we're being shit on from a great height but it will get better I promise you x

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

I'm very very very very very very veryyy yy yy yy hurt im a good person with a very yyyy good clean hesrt with good intentions abd when you love a girl abd you'll do anytime fkr her u have her back and you'll protect anytime and she dont appreciate shit and she runs after the bad boys who don't give a fuck at all then I think whst is love? I think there's something wrong with me

I don't care im not gonna evrr let no gorl into my life or into my stress because I don't care abd shes nothing shes nothing to me so why should I care for? 😂😂😂😂😂 not my problem lol

bitches come and go but no one's loyal so I keep my self to my self I swollow all my pain and tears inside and trust me it's very nasty 😢😢😢😢😢

my heads always hurting abd I always get ill 😢😢😢 whats happened to me?

[Kjb1980 in reply to dontknow467]

You are badly hurt that's what's happened. There are a lot of takers in life learn from it and don't give your heart to easily until you get the same back. Let her move on with bad boys it comes with age and experience when you realise the bad boys are no good! Unfortunately she as all us girls find out and go through hurt to. If you know your good and decent the right girl will see that and want that!! X

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

Lol I like what you said here ahq but idc I changed now forever abd for the best im nlt shy or scared anymore x

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

I'm hurting already

im living in my own world and guess wah im lost

im always living in pain and feel like shit

fuck ppl and fuck everything so sick of everyone and everything

[Kjb1980]

Each day the pain eases up , keep yourself to yourself for now until your ready after you've healed to get back out there xx

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

No not to me I get worse and worse day by day

I feel like shit I feel like I should just end my love and kill my self and then get famous in the news 😂😂😂😂😂

[Kjb1980 in reply to dontknow467]

How old are you if you dong mind me asking ? Your at an all time low killing yourself would devastate everyone around you even though you can't see that now. Why would you want to get the fame ? Being successful and focusing on your passion would be everything! X

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

Message me privately and ill tell you anything you want x

[dontknow467 in reply to Kjb1980]

I dunno I don't want the fan I just wanna be rich and have money on me so I can roll on my own like a g lol and just you know chill on my own because I trust my weld and love my self