hope this maybe helps someone

[Ben86w]

hello

its been a while since i last posted on here, ive suffered with depression and anxiety since i was a teenager never feeling good enough or lovable for anyone and its affected my life massively cost me a few relationships and held me back in life.

i recently spoke to someone about cognitive behavioral therapy since my last update and its helped me a lot, i thought id try and share what i learnt with members to try and help a few people.

i started planning my week filling it with small tasks everyday and forcing myself to do these as its the only way id get better, like just going to the gym, seeing a friend, seeing family, cleaning the house, attempting a new recipe and doing the activities i enjoy, instead of sitting in and over thinking.

i gradually started planning my week with bigger tasks like, going to boxercise, messaging old friends to meet up (which is a big thing as i thought they didnt care), doing a 5km run, going to the cinema and meeting new people off facebook.

just today ive got back from berlin a place ive always wanted to visit, but put off visiting as my anxiety made me worry about every little detail, but after pushing myself with bigger and bigger tasks i booked it and spent 2 nights on my own and i really enjoyed it, something i never thought i could do book a holiday and travel abroad on my own, if it wasnt for cognitive behavioral therapy i wouldnt of gone!

i still have my bad days where i dont want to get out of bed and feel crap about myself, but i know i can get through them by challenging the way i think and telling myself positive thoughts, i do deserve to be happy, i do deserve the best life i can, i do deserve to be loved and not let my problems ruin my life.

quite a few people have said they notice a change in me and i have a lot of better days than bad days now. my relationship with family and friends has improved too.

hope this maybe helps someone, if i can you can!

ben

[Hidden]

Hi good to see you. I am very pleased that CBT helped you and that you are a lot happier now. I think this can help certain kinds of mental health disorders but doesn't with many of us. It certainly didn't help me at all as I know my triggers and what causes them, and why. I know all about the parent/child reactions and making plans and keeping a diary etc. This isn't my issue but I can't get past the emotion and all the understanding why in a logical manner just makes me feel like a failure.

Like I said though it's obviously working for you so well done. Stay positive and strong. x

[Ben86w in reply to Hidden]

thank you coughalot2

i totally understand about the feeling like a failure, ive felt the same for so long too why im trying to challange that, hope you manage to find a way to change how you feel.

good luck

ben

[Hidden in reply to Ben86w]

Thanks Ben I know you do. We all do on here. At this time in my life - I am in my 60's all my energy goes into having as easy and pleasant a life as possible and not rocking the beat until I meet my natural end. Bev x

[Hidden]

What fantastic news. Really pleased you have found a way to change things for the better for you. Onwards and upwards x

[Ben86w in reply to Hidden]

thank you katiekatie

just sharing my story try and encourage other people to try and seek help and change for the better, because mental health problems just ruins your life.

thanks

ben

[Honeybeeyol2]

Hi Ben....That's such a nice story, so glad to hear you are feeling better in yourself. My 18 year old son is presently at that point where he doesn't think he needs help and refusing counselling or cognitive behaviour therapy. He also won't join any of these forums which is a shame as I think it would be very helpful. It sounds as though you were feeling the same as my son is now. I can only hope that one day he will do the same as you, and wish you a continued happiness 😊

[Ben86w in reply to Honeybeeyol2]

Thanks Honeybeeyol2

Just hope it helps other people who feel the same as I have, if I can do it anyone can!

Sorry to hear about your son he's still only young, not many 18 year olds want to talk about mental health do they? I know I didn't and it took me till turning 30 to speak to someone, just be there for him instead of trying to force him ? Sure he will get the help he needs when the timings right.

Ben

[WhiteAlice]

Ben, another success story!! That makes my day. The goal isn't to change ourselves completely. I think some folks are afraid that's how it works. The goal is to be healthier, happier, & at peace. It's folks who are a little bit "off" (me included) who make this world much more interesting.

Keep moving forward!

[Ben86w]

Thank you white Alice

Yeah I totally agree you need to be happy in yourself to be totally happy in life.

Ben