someone please help with this

[mrsherondale]

Alot of stuff has happened to me. I spent my 19th birthday a few days ago crying on the bathroom floor. My grandmother passed away during my A levels exams and i have been trying to get into medicine and have given so many entry tests and i cant bear staying home anymore. I've been feeling unreal and like i am in my body but I am confined within it. I googled my symptoms and I think I suffered from depersonalization and derealizatio. Two years ago I also had sleep paralysis. I used to stay up for days and whenever I slept I woke up and I couldn't move and I felt sharp pins and needles all over my body. It was terrible. And now i have panic attacks and anxiety and I feel like i am zoned out all the time. I can't focus on my reading. My Feet feel heavy and numb sometimeS. My tongue does too. And I feel pins and needles in my feet. I feel I'll die constantly. From this. These symptoms were triggered after I saw this massacre on tv where thousands of kids where shot dead in a school. Idk how to cope with this. I feel I'm going mad half the time. Now I have depression from all this. Not being able to see or enjoy my vacations by reading or stuff. Please someone help me overcome this depersonalization. I feel so zoned out I feel if I breathe deeply I'll just move out of my body and that's making me feel insane. Even the slightest thing tips me off. Idk what to do 😩😣

[Hidden]

Hi I am sorry for your loss and condolences. I think at least part of this is because a loved one has died and don't forget you have to grieve and grief takes many forms all of which are normal for you. As someone who has lost both my parents things can see very surreal for a time.

Added to this is the massacre of children on TV which doesn't help does it? Be kind and patient with yourself.

You don't mention whether you are on any meds or having counselling, if not why not speak to your doctor? Bereavement counselling could also help. I found what helped me most was being with other family coz we all knew how we felt and that was a big comfort. Take care. x

[mrsherondale in reply to Hidden]

I didnt take any meds or counselling but talking to people about this always helps. I asked my mom she said counsellors make you mad than you already are. My doctor always labels this with anxiety. He gave me meds once and I ended up even more sick than usua.

[Hidden in reply to mrsherondale]

Hi just because one med made you sick doesn't mean others will. You might need to try a few before you get one which works for you.

Counsellors don't make you mad and I don't know where your mum got that idea from. A counsellor is someone trained who will listen to you (that's worth a lot) and they will help you with other views on your problems and pointers to help you. They don't tell you what to do but will help you realise what is causing your problems, and help you work them out.

Isn't it worth a try? Or is it better to continue to feel the way you do? Your choice. x

[mstirling]

You should really see a doctor. You'll need to talk to someone to get through this. Psychiatrists and psychologists are there to help you deal with the symptoms you are having, you cannot get answers or treatment for this online. Also, sleep paralysis isn't a big issue if it isn't recurring, although it is very scary and unsettling, it is very common. Especially with people who have a poor sleep pattern!

Talk to someone about these problems asap and explain all your symptoms/feelings.

[mrsherondale in reply to mstirling]

I went to two different doctors thrice and everytime I told them my symptoms they were like anxiety and take antidepressents. They make me feel more numb so I stopped. And Idk any psychologists in my country who are good to deal with this.

Oh no. My sleep paralysis was solved. I just have derealization and depersonalization now. The rest is bearable. I'm living with this since two years. I wish there was a support group here. but my country lacks those and stuff 😔

[Hidden]

Hi.i do agree with what all the others have adviced you.i do feel for you.im sorry about your loss.my father dropped dead in the strèet when i was 16 and that has effected my life completely.i was so close to him.my mum has now passed away a few years ago.my eldest sister died a few years ago too and now my other sister has just been diagnosed with cancer.ive also lost other relatives to death.i suffer from anxiety worrying too much especially about my daughter and little granddaughter and my daughter has a little boy on the way.im even worrying about that cos she has to have a c section. my life is in a constant circle.my stomach is awful through it.i wish you well and let us all know how you get on.alot of us have had to deal with horrible things.best wishes.

[mrsherondale in reply to Hidden]

I'm so so so sorry for your losses. I hope they all find peace. And I hope your daughter has a beautiful healthy living baby. :")

I hope we all make it to our dreams well and happy. Thank you and I hope you get better real soon too

[Hidden]

Thank you so much.i hope you will be ok.x

[mrsherondale in reply to Hidden]

Me too