can someone help please?

[kymberlee21]

im not sure how this works im just assuming you type how your feeling

where do i start..

i've suffered with a few bowts of depression for year and year since i was a young girl,

but each time it creeps back up on me it seems to go a little more intense.

the past few weeks i have at my lowest, one min i am tryint o be happy and putting ona brave face and smiling for my kids sake and the fact i dont want my parents knowing how i feel as im hoping it will go away like the last few times.

i just cannot see it getting any better, i feel as if im stuck ina cycle i cannot get out of.

looking after the kids, school run, shopping, cleaning, after school clubs, swimming and i feel like thats all im for, i feel like im not ment to do anything else just do everything for others.

i love my children to pieces.

i have also been feeling like no one wants to know me, i dont see any of my friends outside of work i just feel like they dont want to make the effort with me, i have always found it difficult to socialize with other people i always think about how they are judging me and if they actully care atall or if they even really want to get to know me,everyone who i have been close to has disappeared.

everything is just piling in up and i cannot see to grasp control of everything anymore,

i have work worries, wedding worries, kids worries, friend worries.making sure everything is done and i cannot cope anymore.

i just want someone to reassure me . i constantly want to cry and i cannot stop it , ive also been intollerant to people also . if they irritate me even inthe slightest and they dont mean it ill go mad.. its not fair on them but i cant seem to change it

[CarmelaGrace]

Hi Kym --- yes, that's how it works...just type away and people should come and say hello, and see if they can help!

You've got a lot on your plate just now. Sometimes everything just gets a bit too much, and that's OK. It sounds like you need to take some time for yourself and treat yourself gently for a bit.

Best wishes,

Carmela x

[Photogeek]

Hi there and welcome, you seem to be under a lot of stress and you certainly have a

Lot going on too, with children and wedding worries. Maybe a visit to your

GP would help, if you know you have a tendency towards Depression, then you

Must prioritise your mental health.

You will just have to ease off all the things that you are trying to juggle and get

Some help with everything. Sometimes writing things down helps us to see

Where we can make small changes.

Hannah

[Suzie40]

Hi Kym, and a big welcome to the forum.

I understand that feeling of trying to hold everything together for the sake of your children and others. To put yourself first is really tricky sometimes.

Have you thought about talking to your doctor about how you're feeling at the moment? It was actually my Health Visitor who I initially confided in about feeling depressed. It was during a routine visit to the house to see how my daughter was getting on that I broke down and sobbed!

Whatever you decide to do, you will always have the support of people on here.

Lucy x

[kymberlee21]

thank you everyone as i never hear words of confidencemy fault it sdue to to not talking with anyone about it, i feel though if i confide in family members i feel like ive failed.. im supposed to be strong tough cookie like a mum is persieved to be and to me talking to family members is my worst nightmare... i will book to see my gp after the weekend. thank you again guys xxx

[losteve]

Hi kym

i myself am very new to this forum and i must admit when you look around at the other posts you realise your not alone in how you feel and to be honest the guys who ive seen try support people are amazing, it really is an eye opener. all i wanted to say was ive been there exactly where you are and how you think, mums are meant to be superheroes and asking for help is kind of a taboo in our minds because we re supposed to be the strong ones. very independant us mums are, with or without a support network, it took me a while to realise i was allowed to admit defeat and ask for help and im glad i did, it took the added pressure off me to be "normal" and the "superhero" and gave myself that push i needed to help get me back on track instead of just existing , i began to live , after all we re all entitled to feel that way, i definately agree with these guys and say you have your plate piling over and you really need to think about you instead of everyone else, if you feel its time to ask for help then you go for it . people are a lot more understanding and helpful than you think and may just have the power to give you that push you need to get you back. take care eve xxxx

[Hidden]

Welcome! yes, just type away!! Thats what I do

You definitely have ALOT on at the moment and obviously are a great mother and put your kids first... Maybe you do just need a day for you, abit of you time. Have you spoken to a good friend or to anyone about how you've felt? Believe me if you havent told anyone, if you do tell someone you will feel sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better. Even having a good cry and someone being there for you without judgment is so helpful and feels like your not alone. But honestly - try to get some good sleep, eat right and tell someone how you feel! I know its hard with kids but abit of you time sounds like its needed to relax xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Hidden]

Hi Kymberley nice to meet you and welcome to the site. My you do have a lot on your plate and this is enough to sink the strongest person to say nothing of the old depression as well. Can you do anything to ease the pressure on yourself? Eg giving up work or doing less hours? Can you afford any help in the house like a cleaner?

You and no one of are superwoman you know and if anyone demands more from you just tell them it's superwomans day off and have another glass of wine!

Bev xx