Low self esteem/stomach rumbling techniques??

[Robyn_xy]

I start school again tomorrow and i'm feeling really low about how i look. i hate my weight and my acne and i know i'm going to feel very anxious and horrid tomorrow, and to top it all off i have to wear this blazer (its compulsary) that makes me look like i'm wearing a carboard box. It makes me look shorter and fatter, and i really don't like it. Also, does anyone have any solutions to making your stomach be quiet when youve not ate much? (i hate eating infront of people, but trust me, i do eat when i'm alone!!) i always have chewing gum and ive read this makes the situation worse but because i get anxious i need to chew on something. Overall i just feel really crap, and i've still not made an appointment with the doctors i just really wish i had someone who understands me in my real life (you guys have been a massive help though!) i know this post may seem immature/childish and it's all to do with my hormones and age, but i don't know how to not feel like this, so please someonehelp :(?

how are you all? i've been inactive for a few days sorry xx

[CarmelaGrace]

Hi,

I can remember how awful first days back were, so you have my sympathy there. Uniforms may be horrible and uncomfortable, but at least you know everyone else hates them too.

I know you might have to take your blazer, but do they make you wear it? For example, could you get a jumper or cardigan in your school colours that you feel comfortable wearing instead, and just carry your blazer? I know some schools are very strict though. (Mine wasn't - they were just happy if we remembered to wear our ties!)

Can you take bottled water into your class? That should help with the rumbles if you don't feel like eating with other people.

Anyway, try and do something relaxing tonight, and maybe organise something nice for after school tomorrow so you have that to look forward to?

Best wishes,

Carmela

[Robyn_xy in reply to CarmelaGrace]

i suppose, i just hate how i look in it, but i'll probably take it off and wear a cardigan (my mum is on my side with this one, we were all forced to pay £28 for a cheapy blazer with material that rips easily, so she disagrees with them haha)

i can take water, but sometimes my stomach still makes noises when i drink it, i usually make a sorta awkward joke about it when people look at me, but this happens everyday, and in the same classes so it's getting to that awkward stage :/

i will, i'm going to go for a nice bath and try not to worry, i think il just be looking forward to get home no matter what i plan for later haha!

thank you for your reply xx

[Photogeek]

Hi Robyn I'm really sorry that your worrying over going back to school. Being sixteen

Is hard at times. Robyn your weight will balance out if you try and eat reasonably

Healthily most of the time. Treat yourself of course, but most teens can put on

A few lbs during these years.

Robyn I can imagine that there are lot of girls who wish they were slimmer, you

are young and I'm sure later on you will be happy with your body .Do you

Do any sports ? This can help with weight skin and stress.

Try not to focus on your blazer, everyone else is going to be feeling the same way,

Some teens who are too thin can feel bad too, Robyn there is no such thing as

A perfect body shape, except Models or Actresses on TV...... The thing to do is

To aim to have a reasonable healthy body. Try and love your body for carrying

You and for being alive

I don't advocate Diets to teens as your body is growing And changing . Try and choose

Healthy snacks when your hungry, fruit, nuts and yogurt. Drink lots of water too

Now your skin, have you. Good medicated cleanser ? That will help, Robyn it can

Be hormonal, so why not ask your Mom to tKe you to Dr. and see what can be done.

Try not to be too self conscious as who in the world is perfect, one may have Acne and

another skin that's too dry. But I would recommend. Dr. S visit

Robyn LISTEN up your Photo is so pretty so please try and relax. Bit and get

Over the day by saying hello to old Pals.

Robyn you sound such a lovely bright mature girl that anyone would want you as a friend

Eating gumi imagine would make the gas and rumbling worse. I find eAting regularly and not letting myself get hungry help with rumbling. I often had my stomach rumble at

Important Work meetings, I used to laugh and say " Gremlins in my tum".

Robyn please let me know how school goes , and remember you always have a friend

Here.

Big hugs.

Hannahx

[Robyn_xy]

I don't eat a lot of sweets or anything, but i drink energy drinks which have a lot of sugar in them so i know thats bad for me, but i'm addicted to caffine (i have at least two of these everyday) but i'll maybe make me "new term at school resolution" to be stop drinking so many haha!

i do some sports, skateboarding and badminton, but nothing that hardcore so i kinda always stay the same weight.

i know i shouldn't be worrying so much, it's just because i really (and i mean, REALLY) do not suit my blazer, in fact when we were getting them fitted my best friend told me to take it off straight away because i looked ridiculous (as you can tell shes very supportive - i'm just kidding, shes great but sometimes doesnt understand how these things stick in my head!) i never used to be as obsessed with how i looked, in fact it's only been recently i've become so consious of it. I think its because i put on half a stone this summer, and i'm really small (im about 5ft 1)

i have medication for my skin (i take pills, use duac and have cleansers etc) but my face and back/chest is having a break out at the moment so its not making me feel any better, but i could do a few things to prevent this (i still eat like a 5 year old because i have an ED that makes me scared to try new foods - sounds pathetic right?) and it means i eat chips and chicken dippers/a salad every night :/

thank you, that really means a lot! I do worry about stupid things all the time but im really trying to help myself, i don't want to feel depressed and anxious all the time.

haha! i sometimes make an awkward joke about my belly, but it happens too often that people are starting to notice it more and they look at me which is someting im so so uncomfertable with.

You're a great person, you always give great advice and personally you've helped me out a lot on here. I can't thank you enough for your advice!

i will let you know how everything goes! ill give you a message tomorrow

thanks again! xx

[Photogeek in reply to Robyn_xy]

Hi Robyn

I'm glad that my post helped a tiny bit. You are amazing and very bright and

Together for 16. Most of all Robyn you have a zany quirky sense of

Humour that I love. I think I'm like that too, being able to see the funny

And absurd side of things has helped me get through lots of things.and your

Description of you in " Le Blazer " had me laughing.

Hugs

Hannah x

[Suzie40]

Lol @ the cardboard box. First day back nerves are awful and I get them too! Try and focus on how you'll feel on your way home tomorrow. It'll be a million times better, I guarantee.

As for the stomach noises, avoid eating acidic foods on an empty tum. I find that apples make my stomach produce weird noises! The thing with chewing gum on an empty tummy is that it stimulates acid production because your body thinks there is food that needs digesting. That's what confuses your tummy and it starts making angry noises.

Your best bet is a biscuit that slowly releases carbohydrates. The Belvita ones are tasty and come in lots of flavours. If you want to chew gum, go for a fruity flavour as opposed to a minty one. This is less harsh on your tummy.

[Robyn_xy in reply to Suzie40]

it genuinely is a cardboard box, haha! The only good thing about them is that theres a phone pocket in them! (which is strange considering i go to a school that banns mobile phones!)

I am, i've went for a long bath and 'im painting my nails, trying to avoid thinking about tomorrow

i'll try the biscuits--i can eat them quick and hopefully it'll stop the noises! haha, that's strange, i never knew that before!

fruity chewing gum sounds like a good idea too. thank you for your tips!

[wallflower_fairy]

Hi Robyn,

I am empathising with you big time here - I remember how cringe-worthlingly self conscious I felt too when I was at school in an unflattering uniform accompanied by all the teen problems. My hair was the bane of my life, I could never get it to stay tidy. There's not really much more I can add but I saw on telly the other day a make up artist doing tuition on the natural look and technique for covering up blemishes (because sometimes the problems with putting make up over it is that it makes it more noticeable) - maybe you could look and see if there's anything on Youtube about it? I don't know if the clip I was watching would be on Youtube but was from a show called This Morning on the ITV channel (it's in the UK, not sure where you're based). Regards to eating in front of other people maybe the way around reducing the stomach noises is compromising with thicker drinks like smoothies? You wouldn't actually be eating in front of anyone but it might make you feel more full(ish), and reduce the noises. Would it be possible maybe just to try eating easy things in front of people, like raisons or breakfast bars? It'll make life so much easier if you're not self conscious to the point where you can only eat alone (also, I think everyone is a little self conscious about eating) so maybe you could desensitise yourself by starting to small, even if it's only getting to the point where you could eat those particular foods comfortably?

About the blazer, I don't know if there's possibly anything subtle you could do to change the shape or the cut ('upcycle'), to make it more suited to your shape? Do you have any textiles whizzes in your family? Just a thought.

I hope tomorrow goes well.

wanderingwallflower xx

[Robyn_xy in reply to wallflower_fairy]

Awuh!I'm sorry you felt that way, its not a nice feeling! :S my hair is the same, i always look as if i've been pulled through a bush backwards haha!

i'll try look for the video yeah im from scotland haha! i do use a lot of make up, sometimes it works really well and on other days it amplifys my acne for some weird reason.

I'm working on it, but i don't like people looking at me and i feel like people will be if i'm eating..i was maybe going to try some belvita biscuits as i can eat them quick and it would stop the rumbling

i was going to ask my mum or aunt but i'm scared incase it looks worse and i'm stuck wearing a ripped blazer haha!

Thank you, i'll let you know how it goes

Robyn xx

[Hidden]

Hello

I started my Secondary school in 1961 and we had to ware full uniform, tie and white shirt, not forgetting short trousers. We had to have full kit for PE and a football strip and boots, the problem was the colour of my strip did not conform with my House. What got to me was we had too ware the short trousers until year 4 I suppose the girls were worse of they had to wear blue nickers for their PE.

Do not worry all cannot be any worse than what we had to ware in the swinging sixties especially the poor kids family could get away from buying the full kit and would be able to ware hand downs.

Good luck for tomorrow, once back you will feel you had never been away

BOB

[CarmelaGrace]

My school hates:

Being forced to wear shorts for PE

PE, especially running, and the pointless bleep test

Going to the loo - toilets broken, no locks on doors, graffiti everywhere, no loo-roll or soap, full of cigarette smoke and the smokers themselves.

The chewing-gum layers stuck under the desks

Having Art on the third floor of A-block, then having to run to third floor of C-block for history in about 4 minutes.

The horrible, dirty, smelly, crowded stairwells.

Having to stand outside the canteen in the rain until your year was called in, and then not being able to find a seat.

[Revell]

Hi, I'm sorry to hear your feeling so low regarding going back to school! I have suffered with insecurities on and off for 26 years now. I've not long finished having a long regular course of private sessions to help and an even longer session of anti- depressions. I'm telling you this not to say you should try this but so you know I understand and so I can pass on some great self help tips I've learned! Firstly it's the really small things that help big time!!! Here some ideas I use most days!

1) 24-7! Breathing technique. Breath in through yr nose for 2 secs. Hold breath for 4 secs. Breath out through yr mouth for 7 secs. This breathing technique won't be seen by anyone else and can be used to slow down situations, help you make a choice, calm the nerves and regain your strength or cope with a difficult moment! (Try this before you leave the house and before you enter the school)

2) think of two parrots! One on each shoulder! One tiny and timid (he's your positive parrot!!) and one on the other ( he's a big firm bugger that is your negative parrot!) make a visual picture of each one on your shoulder in yr head and keep them on the same shoulder. Eg put the positive parrot on yr dominant shoulder. This big negative bugger is swaulking so loud in yr ear you can't hear the positive one!!! So when you get a unwanted feeling (I look horrible in the blazer) shrug yr shoulder with the neg parrot to remind him to shut the xxxx up!! Lol!! If he really xxxx you off you can puntch him if you like!! (Just make sure no ones watching and remember he's sitting on yr shoulder so don't hit yourself!! lol!!

Try these two things this week and let me know how you get on!!! good luck!!

P.s. Remember Spots don't make someone ugly!! But bright Eyes and smiles make someone pretty ! xxx

[Photogeek in reply to Revell]

Hi I like that post of yours. I'm going to try this Parrot Techniques

Myself.

Hannah x

[Revell in reply to Photogeek]

They are really good tips that work!!! Simple but fab!!! xx

[Robyn_xy in reply to Revell]

These techniques relly work! Thank you!! xxx

[Revell in reply to Robyn_xy]

Yours very welcome! This techniques will help you with any problem you may have throughout your life! They worked great for me and I've not looked back! It's all how you talk to yourself!!! It's gona be a good day!!! (And it will be!! ) xx

[WantToChange]

Maybe you could try to eat morfe healthily? I know that things like energy drinks is atrocious for teenage skin. For example, all the sweeteners and E numbers that are in these drinks are disgusting. I really think these drinks shouldn't be on the market.

Why don't you switch to drinking tea? It has caffeine but a lot of health benefits as it has antioxidants. And it tastes way better than those drinks, they're vile! The taste alone puts me off them because I associate it with poison.

Eating foods high in Zinc are good for acne. This is things like seafood, beef and lamb, spinach and pumpkin seeds. There are other sources but I can only think of these ones. Maybe increase these in your diet.

I used to drink a lot of caffeine too (coffee) but I don't anymore, I mostly drink decaf tea unless I'm having a bad day. Caffeine makes your anxiety WAAAY worse btw so that'll be why you're feeling so anxious. These caffeine drinks are only making things worse for you right now, and thye sure are addictive.

[Hidden]

Hi honey. I know how it is to feel un confident about your appearance. I used to suffer from horrendous acne at school. I was teased and bullied about my appearance but in fact I became a model at 18 and have been doing it 10 years! Although doing that doesn't mean I'm happy or any less depressed lol. Anyway, I've picked up things along the way that I can give advice to you. Acne- and I SWEAR by this... And believe me I have tried everything- antibiotics and lotions and birth control this is the only thing that's worked. Get an empty toner bottle, put half apple cider vinegar in (make sure it's the pure one with the mother in it) and then full the rest up with water. It stinks- but use this day and night as a toner. Then rub on benzoyl peroxide cream afterwards, followed by a simple moisteriser. You must moisturise! The toner has the same effect as an expensive skin peel and treatment, since using it my acne has almost vanished. Remember it takes a while to work fully but you should see results.

As for the weight and the tummy rumbling- chewing hun is going to make that ten times worse! When you chew your stomach unconciously prepares to recieve food, so if you are not giving it that food to digest it has stirred up all the acid for nothing which is what makes the grumbling. Make sure you eat little and often to avoid rumbles in the jungle. And no wheat- that sometimes gives me rumbles.

Weight wise- well not everyone is blessed with a thigh gap, I try and exercise daily although when I'm depressed it's difficult, and don't eat after 6pm. I use a calorie tracker on my phone, try and stick to a 1000 calories a day, and go for regular runs and walks. It does make you feel better. Losing weight by crash dieting will only make you weak and gain weight again the minute you have something carby, as your body goes into starvation mode and tries to absorb every little ounce of fat if you don't give it regular nutrition.

Hope this helps chin up x