I've had depression for a real long time, longer than i initially though, there is a whole black spot of missing memories in my head due to something called PTSD i apparently now have, but because of it i dont remember most of my teenage years. It turns out i was on anxiety and depression medication from about 12 to 16.
Anyway my mental health has been on a downward trajectory for over 5 years now and seeking advice many people advice me to go see my GP but TL;DR i didnt want to burden the NHS and other people with my problems so i shut myself today.
Well today i woke up at 8 (despite not sleeping til 4am) phoned the doctors and talked, went in to have a face to face, and i'm on more antidepressants. it's good cause i've actively taking steps to work on my health, for the better for once.
I hope i dont give up on this though, it might be my last chance