just rotate it. snowy owl. a bit far, sitting there. used to walk there a lot. eagles, terns, osprey, falcons, and the waterfowl... one type - forget the name, runs on the water back and forth doing a line dance, flapping wings with her suitor. GREBE , that's it. various types. harbor seals, sea lions - quite big - almost thought i was seeing a sea elephant, similar to a walrus.
packing. tons more to do. got fed up woth sitting and paying big rent , watching my money burn up my near future. how could i exit with any dignity flat broke. well , dignity dwells in many places after all doesn't it.
sleep soon. "praying" i can sleep till 330am. 6 hours till 3 , that would be okay but i will use the washroom by 1130 then try to stay away from my smarty phone. the thing that iis okay now is that whatEVER the outcome(s) almost, at least i AM acting. on my life and THAT means a lot to me who has been this frightened little man too very long now. what will i do exactly, who shall i choose to "be"...? should i bring my couch, hang my paintings, or be realistic and get a menial job, i DON'T KNOW!!! too bad for YOU!! (lol) ... when is ACT ONE /SCENE TWO??? know what? i miss camping and fishing too. i might go after i move. got a free camping space for a week up coast. maybe i can live on cereal and fish, some oysters, muscles,seaweed..........then after we go to Cortez Isle...
Complex PTSD i cant remember what happeneded after I rescued my sister from a suicide attempt?
I want to be healed soon
Very horrible dream. 
