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Back again need your help-hysterectomy tmoz and scared

VictoriaPlum profile image
28 Replies

Hi all

Here is my usual pop on cry for help which is selfish I know, as I am not on here helping others :(

My hysterectomy is tomrrow and I am scared and only 33 not ready to give up my womb :(

I am mega busy with 2 kids and working as a community development manager for Camelia Botnar Children's centre, as well as having bad fibro on hourly morphine, so finding the time to come on here is hard, so please forgive me and send a little tlc my way? :( i always feel better after my random rants on here :)

I dont know what i amscared of having had 2 c sections and always in pain, but am scared :(

I am usually positive but feel really negative about this like something is going to go wrong and my babies will losemore of their mummy than they have :(

I know its silly and its even being donw privately by the nhs as they cancelled me 6/7 x since Sept so i know i will get the best treatment possible!

Its tomrrow afternoin, and apparantly i come home Wednesdag 10am and cant get my head round that as thet are going back through my c secrion scars! its too soonand is really bothering me :(

positive note i am going to wean off my hourly morphine patches whilst recovering as hoping this is my new lease of life fingers crossed :)?

Please excuse spelling as typing quick on my phone and missing the letters lol

Thankyou for your selfless support, it really is apreciated x

28 Replies

Hi, I can relate to you here I had a total hysterectomy at 35 I had one child and they went through my c section.. I had mine because of endometriosis and I can honestly say its the best op I ever had ... Plenty of pain relief, because of my fibro which causes more pain after ops.... in my case they kept me in for 5 days with plenty of pain relief while other people went home much sooner, they didnt plan to keep me in that long but they realised i needed longer to recover so don't worry about them chucking you out early...if you are in pain they will keep you in and make sure you are ok. Yes it was hard when I got home not being able to pick up my young son but we had plenty of cuddles... I was put on low dose hrt a few weeks after due to having everything removed and felt and still feel the same as I did with everything there except the extra pain has gone....

It's natural to be worried but if it goes well which I am sure it will then there is nothing to worry about

Good luck and when you are back home and feeling better pop in and let us know how you feel

VG x :)

VictoriaPlum profile image
VictoriaPlum in reply to

Awwww thank you! i am having womb only as have acute adenoymyosis, ovaries and cervix apparantly look ok via scan fingers crossed. my kids are 1 and 5 so i too will struggle !

i am just not ready to lose what my kids grew in and were so osw to me in , but have no choice and my periods kill me :(

I amlooking forward to feeling better i really am but itsbefore that that scares me :(

Thankyou for being so lovely xxx

tettridge profile image


I think VG has covered everything, but I know I am only a bloke but my daughter had to have her hysterectomy when she was only 28 because of the big 'C'

I know it makes you feel as though you are getting rid of your womanhood but honestly us blokes definitely do not look at it like that, we still see the person and when you are ill that is when we can show you how we can look after you and make sure you follow doctors orders.

Make sure you have all the information before you go home and any of those picker up things so you can pick things up without bending over.

Good luck for the day and hope your convalescence is not to frustrating as I know what it is like to have to 'take it easy' as it is almost impossible to not do things like peel some potatoes or just to do a simple job and to get told off as we know we are able to do things but our significant other has other ideas.

Take care and kindest regards


tettridge profile image

Forgot to say 'Keep us posted with your progress as sometimes the down days can be so wearing that it helps to have a good old rant and after all that is what we are here for.

Take care and kindest regards


Oh hunny, hope you recover quickly. Ive not had to go throught that experience but i'm sure i would feel exactly the same, prob worse im a rite wuss whe it comes to me having anything done. U should c the state of me b4 visiting the dentist. You have every rite to feel scared, especially been away from your kids. But as u say its getting done private i'm sure they will look after you.

And here i am researching and writing away for my interview in the morning absolutley bricking it because im scared my mind and memory is goin to let me down and i'm going to make a fool of myself....

It just proves what i always try to tell myself, theres always someone goin through worse than me, at the end of the day hunny if its goin to put an end to your pain then it will be benificial to you and your babies having their mum back feeling much better and in less pain.

All the best for tomorrow, look after yourself thats whats important. These docs do this everyday, they know what they are doing.

(((Gentle hugs)))

Lets us know how you are in a few days when your up to it.

xxx shelley

Wishing you all the best for the op. I'm sure it will all go well. As VG said, they won't discharge you until they are sure it's ok to do so. I hear your sadness about losing your womb. You have 2 lovely children, and at the moment it is draining you of the energy you need to look after them. Hopefully, once you have recovered physically from the op, you will be feeling so much better that you will reconcile to losing that part of you.

I had total hysterectomy some years ago, but my youngest was already 21 then, so a rather different picture. I didn't feel the way you feel, but I can empathise. Don't let your grief interfere with your recovery.

All the best


mummy69 profile image

Hi xxxx I know exactly what u mean xxxx I am having the same op next month xxx and I was told by my mother (who had a hysterectomy at 30, and was told this by her doctor) ..... Think of it as "the nursery is going but u still have the play room" .... U will b fine and when I have mine next month we will b able to give each other strength xxx good luck honey xxx will b thinking of u xxx

Sthandra profile image

Good luck for tomorrow and enjoy the pampering while you can, I was in my 30's when I had mine done, womb an cervix due to excusiating pain at all times, but was worse during periods and heavy ones they were lasting 2,3 and sometimes 4 weeks, I am so glad that's over, just have fibo and arthritic pain to put up with now. Anyway best of luck for tomorrow try not to worry to much big gentle hugs. Sithy

Sthandra profile image

That was me deleting as message sent twice silly phones, best of luck again for tomorrow. Sithy being dizzy.

VictoriaPlum profile image

Hi all thank you all so much for your lovely messages , i have been sick all morning and not sure if nerves or bug so not sure they will even operate arghhhhh so fed up :(

velvetv profile image

Hi VictoriaPlum

My thoughts are with you, although you may not see this till after, but will be sending positive thoughts your way. I had a partial in 2001, luckily enough I had mine done without external scarring, the healing time was also quicker. I'm sure you'll sail through it and your lil'uns will be just fine with Mummy feeling a lot better.

Any operation now days makes you worry but PMA is what you need, if you can fight your way through what you've suffered already you'll do the same with this. xox to you and yours

ladymoth profile image

Hi Victoria Plum,

It's nowhere near as bad as a C-section, and it's good they're using the same scar - you will end up with only one scar which will fade within a year. It will heal better, too.

One thing I learned when I had this done - and from nursing other girls who had the op - you get awful wind, so take a pack of peppermints (XXXX strong!) and/or some peppermint tea-bags!

It doesn't affect your womanliness in any way, you won't notice the difference except you'll be free of monthly problems, heavy bleeding etc. You have two nice children, and I'm sure they won't worry if you don't produce any more brothers or sisters for them.

Rest as much as you can - and why not try the peppermint tea now? It's very good for upset tums, even tummy bugs, so it won't hurt to get going on it .

Best wishes for tomorrow, but I know you'll sail through it and be home safe and sound in a couple of days.

Love Moffy x

eirwen profile image

i hope everything goes ok for you babe.. i had hysterectomy at 40, after having womb and overies removed it was then found out i had disc trouble in the lower back and fybro causing all the problems so there was no need for the hysterectomy. lokk after yourself and i hpe it all goes well xx

robcathy profile image

Hi Victoria

I am sending you a big hug and to tell you that I had a hysterectomy 6 yrs ago. It was the best thing that I could have done. Yes its worrying, but you know you can do it. Youv'e had two children, what can be harder that that! I haven't looked back Yes you lose a bit of yourself, so what? You have children. No more monthlies, pain (apart from FMS of course!) You can plan things without worrying if you are going to on your period, at that time. Come back to me, a few weeks time, when you are back to normal, to tell me how much better you feel. You must do as you are told and rest, rest!

Good luck, my friend I would go through it again, if I had to.

Cathy X

Teddysmum43 profile image

Am sending love n hugs too,I would be terrified too,don't beat yourself up over that. Somehow a strength kicks in and you will get through this. I've had a caesarean and also back surgery but not had my womb removed. Yes it won't it be very nice for a while but in the long run it will be so much better for you. Let us know how you are.

Ali xx

sharne27 profile image

Hiya i had hystrecromy just over year ago at age of 26 also have 2 kids to look after as long as you have support you will get threw it. big hugs xxxxxx

sue32 profile image

I know exactly how you feel chuck! Had my hystero in 1998 and it was the best thing that ever happened! I had my op under an epidural and it was great! Never felt the needle or anything. I was more bothered about getting my legs on the table before it took effect, cos I'm rather a big girl! Was able to listen to music at the time and the anaesthetist was brilliant. I had no problems at all. But I was a right mess before the op, thinking the same things as you. Had a great hubby at the time too, and he was really supportive. Try not to worry too much VP, you'll be home in no time, and remember, you'll need to rest once you get home. Good luck hun, thinking of you!! XXXXXX

angib53 profile image

Hi , I had a total hysterectomy when I was 31 and 3 years ago I had my ovaries taken , best thing I had done , I to had endometriosis in the womb , first time I was in 7 days , and when I went in to have ovaries removed I was in 5 , . I went to two different hospitals and both were wonderful , my sons at the time were very young but you get through , make sure someone isthere to help if you can for a while , you will be rid of one pain once you have it done eendometriosis is painful and drags you down . Thinking of you , tc angie xxx

Wishing you a speedy recovery. I had a total hysterectomy when I was 42 (am 60 now) and it was the best thing I ever did. I was very nervous about having it done as I had my family at home at the time. When I think what my life was like before the op, continually bleeding so much I didn't dare go out. Just remember when you get back home to listen to your body, and don't do too much too soon. xx

Sharolina profile image

Hi, I had mine done at the end of 2010, but had a few complications so it took a little while longer to recover. But don't worry, you'll be back on your feet in no time. I don't have kids, but I knew it was the best thing for 'me' to do, and I don't have any regrets. Living with fibro is bad enough, but dealing with other illnesses and problems on top, which can be sorted, just makes life a little easier. Take time to recover, and look after yourself first and foremost!

Hope it all goes well for you.


cutebird profile image

Hi, just read your message, and wanted to send you love and best wishes. I'm sure that you'll be given the best care and attention. And you have your family for support. And all of us on the website too!! I know how hard it is to work while feeling ill and in pain. I worked for almost six years before I was forced to give up work. But you have kept working, and I have great admiration for you, for not giving up and carrying on in your job. So best of luck for tomorrow, and sending you all my love. Take care xx

secretldy profile image

wishing you all the best. i can understand how you feel, to me the womb is the woman part of me, and giving that up would be a real mind blow. My sister had a hysterectomy years ago and tells me that its the best thing she has ever had done. She suffers the same as we do, and i think she was very brave.

I have had the op to stop me having babies and i'm going through the change of live now. so nothing works down there any more.

I wish you all the luck and hope you can come off your morhine patch. My doctor has put me on morphine tablets.

Please go slow, and do all the doctor tells you, and i really hope you feel better.

somernight profile image

Its the beat thing i did lol. I have 3 childrwn and felt affraid also but so happy i did it. With all the other pain and cramps and yuk it was time i did it at 37. Good luck and prayers are with you

chambers profile image

Hi just saw your message i had hysterectory cause i had endometrioisis when i was 33years old sorry about the spelling i had it all taken expect for my cervics i dont have any childern but i dont regert it , i think for me you get the first 2 weeks out the way then it starts to get easyer you can have it by key hole surgery now not like i had it a few years ago im 48 in july now do as your told and rest take it easy and you will do just fine ok xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Corpew profile image

hi sending best wishes i had mine at 29. only had a daughter and lost a son was like you felt so low and scared i had cancer so no choice in it but after just a short while felt like a new woman. think of postive no more peroids think of money you will save not having to buy pads.

but honstly i had mine 27 years ago when you had to spend 10 days in hospital but it was not as bad as i thought recovered quick think postive that my advice.loads of hugs and hope it all goes well for you x x x

pepperflo profile image

Hope everything went ok with your op, you might not feel like it at the moment,but I assure you it will be the best thing you ever did, I mean think what treats you can buy yourself with the money your saving each month, even if it's just a bar of choccy or some nice bubble bath. I had mine In 2000 and at the time, I was sad to think I would never have anymore children, but 9 years later my darling little,Granddaughter was born, and a new,Grandson due this,May, so not all bad, rest, enjoy and make the most of the pampering, hugs and kisses to you xx

VictoriaPlum profile image

Hi all apologies in late reply, thankyou all so much for your support :)

The op went ahead abdominally and went really well until i woke up and found their pain relief had counteracted with my morphine resulting in NO PAIN RELIEF! I was in and out of consciousness and really scarey :(

However, getting flu on day 2 and constant sneezing and coughing kind of took over my recovery which in hindsight was a godsend as too poorly to think about the contaxt of the op!

3 weeks later felt amazing and went back to work ooops

Then got ill, had an infection, vomited blood and here i am recovering from that :(

So not been too great as having HUGE flare up due to all the sickness, cant take my meds as cant keep them down and have gp out to inject me with anti sickness meds grrrrr

But am still working from my sick bed as so much to do and its a childrens charity i work for!

Feeling quite down today as 33 going on 73 yearsold and cant sleep due to pain :(

Sorry for negative response :(

ebony4ivory profile image

Hi victoria I had a full ( everything was taken) hysterectomy when i was 28. It wasn't done by keyhole like they do today.

You will be fine. Take care

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