Snow clearance service

Snow clearance service

After reading of Kazfs nasty accident this morning and yesterday I did catch some posts where people were having trouble with the snow so I sent my OH out into the garage to modify my mobilty scooter.... So after KazF has borrowed my mobilty scooter to clear her road just give a yell and I,ll send KazF round to clear your road too...

What !!!! You didn't think I was going to venture out in this snow did you?????

VG x

39 Replies

  • Thanks for the offer VG, but after my escapade this morning, I want all round bumpers like a dodgem car, and a high visibility inflatable suit like Mrs Michelin! Is your OH up to that level of modification?

  • Is that OK .... My OH is now having a lie down....

    VG xx

  • Is there no end to your OH's talents? (Stands back in amazed admiration)

    I'm a bit worried about getting lost in the snow. And the fog. I've heard there's a lot of fog this morning. What I need is something to attach to his tail that will ping me back to base (that's your garage btw) ah, I know ......

  • Grumbles and sends OH out to the garage to hang fog lights from the boxing gloves and to tie 700 miles of knicker elastic to the tail which leads back to a winch in the garage.... There I think that should cover most of the country.....

    VG ;)

  • Hi VG I know this snow is "Irritating" most who can't get around, and also "side effects" from the cold are tenfold, I just had to congratulate you on your wonderful sense of humour reading these blogs has had me in stitches regarding your sense of humour of course and not regarding any accidents, so a big "THANKYOU" for really lifting my spirits today and i'm sure you've lifted many more as well, THANKS. Mels.x

  • Thank you for posting and please join in any time once I know people like them I include them into the madness... It keeps me sane ... Well as much as I can be

    VG x

  • you need fog lights attached now and ur set, oh and maybe a fog horn just incase

  • Thanks Lullabell.

    I was starting to run out of excuses!

    VG I need a foghorn.

    Turns and runs before VG can live up to her name and start shouting

  • My OH has been busy there is now a switch on the handle that activates the nose as a fog horn and the boxing glove hands now glow red to double as fog lights......

    So no excuses Kaz... Stop working in your nice snug house and start clearing

    Sits in reclining chair awaiting a nice clear road

    VG ;)

  • Bah! Foiled again!

    Retreats to smallest room (in nice snug house) to think up more excuses!

  • Get off the toilet and start clearing........ You simply can't stay on the toilet all day it will leave a nasty ring on the back of your thighs

    VG :o

  • sorry - can't clear snow today - stuck in here! (and don't you DARE start humming 'oh dear, what can the matter be!)

  • Ok I,m sending in a rescue squad .... Hope you are dressed decently ... No it's not hunky firemen ... It's a drain cleaning service..... That should get you moving if you don't want a drain rod in your buttock

    VG x

  • ohhh - you could at least have sent the hunky firemen!

    Anyway, I can come out now - it's far too dark to go out clearing snow. So I'm off the hook now til tomorrow - by which time I will have thought up some more (feeble) excuses!



  • While we were all waiting my OH rigged up spotlights ... The whole thing lights up... Grab Moffys sexy thermal underwear and get out there.... Your fibrotmites need you... Points a finger at Kaz while wearing a false moustache

    VG x

  • Is that the gold ones?

    Do I wear them over the onesie?

  • Whichever looks best on you ..... I think the underwear might hold up the onsie feet better if you wear it over the onsie.... There are night vision goggles under the seat.

    Good luck

    VG xxx

  • my road is clear but please come past I'd love to see you.


  • VG, I am SO relieved that you have found a good use for the spare 700 miles of knicker elastic. The only trouble is that my knickers have now fallen down with a clang, so please send supplies ASAP!

    Also, could you send the snow-clearing service to Southampton Airport? I'm hoping to catch the next FibroAir flight to 'Somewhere Hot'. That's the only destination they could offer me, as they haven't got a navigator yet!

    I'm worried about Air Commodore Libby. Since she's been flying, she's grown one of those RAF type handlebar moustaches, and it doesn't suit her at all - maybe you could speak severely to her - or threaten her with the drain rods!

    Yours, covered in sun cream ...Moffy x

  • I could bring my sat-nav and sun cream 8-)

  • Oh my gosh juggles gold thread to send to Libby to hold up her knickers and a razor to moffy for her moustache a map to Sandra for the roads to sweep and a book to read in the sun for Kaz........

    VG :)

  • no o o o o! I'm going to be the navigator! I've got my sunnies on 8-)


  • Ahhh umm when you all get the items can you arrange a swap with whoever gets the items you should have..... :(

    VG x

  • Ow.... I just sat on a drain rod

    Sits down in amongst all the chaos and thinks of chocolate


  • Ooooh! You sent me the chocolate by mistake - ta muchly!

    Chomp, gobble, slurp - burp! x :p :) :p

  • Drools and tries to think thin..... 3 weeks without a biscuit crisp cake or chocolate.... Yes I am thinner and healthier but sometimes when the pain gets bad I think .... I am sure choccy would release some nice pain releasing endorphins, but I know if I give in after such good results I,ll just eat my way back up.... The first thing I will do when I have got to my target weight is celebrate with a small bit of choccy

    So get a small horde ready to share

    VG x

  • Have you mis-typed a word vg? and if so why a small horse to share? surely a big carthorse as were not all so slim!

  • I must have been thinking of a chocolate horse like a chocolate Father Christmas or a chocolate Easter bunny... Either way a horde of choccy horses sounds perfect

    VG x

  • Isn't it a HERD of choccy horses - lol!

  • yeh I've heard of horses lol! :D

  • I thought a herd was cattle then i thought maybe it was for horses too then I thought no I just want so much choccy I,ll go for a horde.. Preferably a secret horde all for myself to look at .... Drat this diet

  • yummmmmmm!

  • i have been stuck indoors as the snow is so bad,cant see the kerbs from the road and I have no desire to fly lol

  • Amanda you have my sympathy I have been out 4 times since dec 19th and 3 of those times were drs and dentist appt and the taxis were all busy so I was late for one appt, fortunately I phoned and they were very understanding. Still I have had some amazing adventures in my head while using the lightweight pedal exerciser you recommended.

    VG x

  • Ok, so I set out to clear the roads, using the spotlights, foglights, and other gadgets, thoughtfully provided by VG's other half. There are so many bloomin' knobs, dials, switches and buttons on this contraption! I've been stuck in the driveway for 20 minutes trying to find the instruction manual. All I've got is a bottle of sun tan oil to go on the wheels and a copy of fifty shades of grey with the inscription 'enjoy yourself on the beach'.

    There's no map, so I can't find my way to Amanda's house to dig her out.

    And now - to top it all off - I'm surrounded by a herd of chocolate horses!

    I'm off home!

    (and I'm taking some of the horses with me - teehee)


  • Make sure you don't have a munch on the way Kaz! :O :P

    Have you seen VG's latest antics, her OH has built her a tank, but not the sort you're imagining! She's having a bit of bother adjusting to the lack of water . . . . .

  • The knicker elastic came in useful as a lassoo to capture them wild horses!

    I think VG's OH got fed up of her pedalling in the living room - lol! Decided she needed something more adventurous than an armchair cycle.

  • I think Moffy is busy stitching up some new undies for us all with the current shortage of elastic lol! I can almost hear the hum of her sewing machine . . . .

    Check this out Kaz -


  • Ah, I was wondering about the humming. I thought it might have been VG singing to the world again! Looking forward to a new supply of wonder-woman over-pants!

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