went for a shower today in my adapted wet room as always cat purdy came into my litter room to supervise
I threw my glorious (not) mop of wet hair back slipped and kept going all 132 kgs of me,
the shower curtian became excited at the fullbody contact and wrapped itself lovingly around my naked wet body down I went backwards saying a quick hi to the cat as i passed afterall i did not want her to feel left out of theis niceday for a wet wedding.
she hissed spat and ran but unfortunately the curtain that holds the water back was now on the floor carressing my body and the water was pouring over the floor she leapt up and landed in three inches of water slipped and fell over who says cats dont jpin in the fun
i hit the floor with a bang on the head and realised that it has always taken three or four people to lift me when i fall
to press the assisst button or not to press the assist button thatis the question...... no no no they cant geti n i am against the door they will have to bring in fire men to crash the door down and then there was the bathroom door that i was blocking in full naked glory. oh god why did i let the cellulite regroup..
get up push the damn button or drown but do something woman
I rolled over......... who says beached whales cant roll over they can if faced
with too many people looking just imagine the neighbours and then theres the dreaded u tube
spurred on by this thought i crawled towards the only stable thing close nuff to help the toilet and closed the lid and used itto lever me me but forgettingmomentarily that i was tangled with a heavy shower curtain and that i was as slippery as as an eel i found my hand slipping across the top of the toilet only to have my chin say hello to the floor again by now my cat was hysterical and i was laughing so much i just sat there a while in the freezing cold,
sanity regained at i used a towel on the toilet and dragged me up dried myself off covered the floor with every towel in the house my shoulders have no decent joins anymore due to degenerative arthritisand were sore from losing the weight lifting lifting contest.so i could not mop upmy poor littlecat hatestobe wet she is persain cross and very fluffy.as itis cold i worriedaboutherand called her todry her off she sat and is still sitting in a huff wherei cant reach her .
now my questions are will i fall pregant with baby shower curtains how long is the gestation period and can i find home for them quickly and finally will my cat ever forgive me