disabled single parent finally gets some help!!

well finally i have given in and asked social services for help. up until last yr i was married and now single, i am finding it REALLY difficult to look after myself and the two boys i have ages 7 and 9.

i have fms, cfs, depression and b12 aneamia.

i now have a carer in a morning fo 30 mins to help wash my hair and dress etc and i also get help shopping.

it took ages for me to swallow my pride and ask for help but i am glad i did.

its so difficult being young, disabled and a parent. ppl look at me and dont see a disability and so dont realise the pain etc i am in. luckily i had a good woman come assess me and she wrote loads down and took a real interest in fibromyagia.

10 Replies

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  • Well done asking for help, some battles are hard to fight alone. Hopefully you will get the best advice and support. I have been on my own with three children, it's a big responsibility and it isn't easy, I became an expert at cutting corners in no time!

    Wishing you all the very best. If we can help in any way, please ask. We are here for you and we do care about you.

    Take care. (((hug))) xx

  • aww ta liberty, its good to get all the info you can. i too am an expert in cutting corners lol,

    my lads have grown up with me like this so are used to it and can be self sufficient but they are kids and i dont want them to feel burdened.

    my idiot ex always takes the chance to tell them how useless i am but luckily they know better to listen.

    will be on here quite a lot i think lol.

    mel x

  • Please feel free to come here as often as you wish, we will always be here to listen, to help where we can and to support you as much as we can. It's good to have you here with us.

    Take care. (((hug))) xx

  • Well done you :) its nice to hear of positive support in the real world. Thanks for sharing it gives all of us some hope

    VGx

  • Well done because I know how embarrassed I was the first time I had home care (many moons ago) I felt humiliated having someone come in and do my housework - that feeling soon wears off tho and you look forward to them coming. It was only when I worked for social services years later that I discovered what a difficult job they have and not everyone appreciates them. I'm glad you are getting the help you need and knickers to what anyone else thinks :-)

    Storm x

  • good to hear there is help out there and glad you got the help you needed leuvenquinn,

    can you or anyone tell me if this kind of help has to be paid for and is it expensive? my son could do with some domestic help but hes on sick benefits( dont know the new names for these things but not on DLA, he got turned down for that on appeal ) has just had his ATOS assessment done and waiting for the results now. he does plan on appealing if hes turned down for the support one so probably wont have any spare money to pay for help.Ive helped him as much as i am able now both financially and physically but being elderly and disabled myself its too much now,though still do his washing for him.but hes in a first floor flat and bringing his washing home and taking it back is also getting too much for me. besides i wont always be here to help him. so any info on this would be a great help in deciding whether to go down that path if its available for him.

    thanks for any info on this,in advance... xxx

  • if you call social services they can come and assess your son and see what they can offer him. its all means tested, i pay 7 pounds a week for 4 hrs care. so its not too bad. x

  • thank you leuvenquinn . will look into it.

  • Well done you for asking for help , I have 4 kids but they are all older now so I know how lucky I am , I dont think that I would cope if I had younger children , I dont usually comment here im normally just a browser but your comment lifted my spirits I have worked with children for a long time before fibro struck me down and I know how hard this decesion must of been for you but I really respect you and your decesion as it can only be beneficial for you all andi wish you the best of luck for the future my kids really help me now so the pain of bein a single parent was well worth it as id be lost without then now its a hard job on its own even harder with small kids to but it will be worth it xx

  • Ur so lucky! Glad they arnt all useless! I went to them for help! My husband cares for me an we have 2 children, he got attacked leaving him brain damaged so I had to take over as carer, I found this so difficult I knew I needed help! They ignore all illnesses an medical problems an I didn't get any help :(

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