Stuck on you
I noticed that the weather had been turning out much colder
And when the air is cool outside I find that I am bolder
So up I go to finds my boots and travel lands uncharted
To find the heel and sole divorced, yes they have parted.
Now hubby knows how I can be and hides the dangerous things
But I know he has it somewhere, superglue does not have wings
So I venture to the cupboard where he keeps his bits and bobs
And all those nice exciting things he uses for his jobs.
So in I go, torch in hand, to look for what I seek
He has so much stuff in there it could well take me a week
Then I see it, yes I do, a pack full in all its glory
And please read on if you dare to follow with my story.
I climb the stairs once again to do this little job
I trip and try to save myself, my hand it hits my gob
I suppose I was just lucky that I held the glue up high
It could have been real nasty had I stabbed it in my eye.
I sit upon the bed and I start to read the label
Then I place my broken boot upon the bedside table
I twist and tug, and tug and pull and using all my might
The lids flies off the other way and then I get a fright.
My hand it feels all sticky and I don't know what to do
I tell my legs to stand up quick and head off to the loo
Then I see there's something wrong, my legs they just won't move
And when they do I find my brand new quilt is getting in the groove.
I cannot put the glue down the tube is welded to my hand
And as I try to free it I notice it's THAT brand
I stare at it in horror, Loctite it says on the label
And as I flop down on the bed I get stuck to the ruddy table.
Never one to give up I try to get the boot and fix it
And think to myself, Fibro and glue, you should never mix it
I finally get the glue in and push the bits together
I wish hubby would come home, this will last forever.
So in he comes and shouts my name and wonders where I am
I tell him I'm upstairs and I got myself in a hell of a jam
He comes up to help me and rips me from the quilt
And then I look at all the mess and am consumed with guilt.
My quilt was pretty purple and now it is in the bin
How was I supposed to know you open superglue with a pin
And my favourite jeans are patchy not fit for wear no more
And the boots I wanted to repair were stuck onto the floor.
I wanted to save money by fixing the things I already had
And now it's cost us even more, that makes me feel so bad
So now I don't touch superglue, leave it to the experts
Coz when I try to open it, superglue, yes it squirts.