Fibromyalgia Action UK
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A fortnight of Hell

On the 11th of September the husband of a dear friend died of Melanoma cancer. It all happened very quickly. She has also had treatment for breast cancer, and she has M.S. He was her sole carer. On the 14th of September I was driving back from Kent, (I live in Essex), Where I had just collected my new mobility car from my son. (he works for a ford dealership there, in case you were thinking why on earth I had travelled so far for a car!)

While stuck in a bumper to bumper traffic jam, my mobile rang. Luckily I had my carer with me and she turned on the loud speaker so I could talk to my mum.. Mum told me, near hysterically, that my step dad had died 30 mins earlier! (he had emphasyma and FM He had been my dad for over 30 years as my father had died in a car crash, on his 52nd birthday, In a foreign country.

I had to ring my sons, from the car, and tell them the sad news. It was one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do. The most difficult was burying my son 24 years ago. He was a cot death. (me suffer with stress? Never!)

On Monday we buried a wonderful, caring and loving man... My dad... and today we buried another, Peter, my friends husband..

I am so very tired and everything aches and is swollen. But, for a change, I have a reason to feel so awful. Now I can only hope for time to recuperate and re group.

14 Replies

Hi Eranox,

So sorry to hear of your bad news I hope it doesn't play too much havoc with your pains, and ill health, awful, take care love xxxxxxxx


Thank you Claire

Gail x


much sympathy Gail it is hard enough to deal with loss when we are well.

One thing that stood out for me in your post is how much love shines out of it for these two men.

one who was your Dad, a Grandad and Husband;

the other your friend and a Husband.

they have gone but they live on in everyones' memories and when the pain of grief eases, you will smile and rejoice that they were part of your life.




My sympathies at your double loss, how awful for you. It is going to take a lot of coming to terms with as you go through the grieving process. Treat yourself gently and time will gradually heal you,

((((( gentle hugs )))))

Julie xxx


Hi Gail, I'm so very sorry to hear of your sad loss recently and of the passing of your son all those yrs ago! No wonder you will hurt with all the stress you have had to endure. As someone else has said please take things easy and look after yourself! If you don't then you won't be any good to help your mum with her pain in her loss too, you all need to be strong together, you will get through this Hun. Big hugs love Annie xx


So sadden by your post, may god grant you and your loved ones peace strenght and courage at this sad time. ((((((hugs )))))) from Belfast you are in my thoughts and prayers Dixie x


Love to you, your family and friends during this dreadful time. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Jane x


Very sad to hear your news -be gentle with yourself while you try to come to terms with everything.

In my thoughts xx


Thank you all so very much for your comments and concern... Your kindness to a stranger has brought tears to my eyes x Love and Light to you all x


so sad to to hear all your grief made me felt really upsetx to read your post my thoughts are with you and your family and freinds xxxx God blessxxxx


You poor Darling such a grim time for you- such devasting news and to have to deal with it in the car!

I send my deepest sympathy to you and yours. God Bless xxxxxxxxxxx


Thank you for your comments... x xx


how awful for you, so much to cope with at once xx


Thank you Lynn x Things are calming down a bit now. Just got to make sure I am ready and able to offer support and understanding when my mum or friend needs it. My fibro is holding stationary at the moment so here's hoping x


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